Thou Shall Find Lovecraft Online, Ramen

(I’m a waitress in a popular buffet chain restaurant. I am serving a middle-aged customer who is wearing a shirt that has a picture of Cthulhu and the Flying Spaghetti Monster in a heart. Beneath it is the caption ‘we met on the internet’.)

Me: “That’s a great shirt!”

Woman: “Thanks. I think it says a lot about the kind of people you find on the internet.”

Me: “How do you mean?”

Woman: “You know, how there’s nothing but monsters online.”