The Pen Is Mightier Than The Customer

(This all takes place over the phone.)

Customer: “Hi, I would like to know how much the Montblanc rollerball and ballpoint pens are?”

Me: “Okay, which ones?”

Customer: “There are only two kinds, rollerball and ballpoint.”

Me: “Right, I understood that, but we also carry fountain pens. I meant which specific design?”

Customer: “The black ones.”

Me: “Sir, they’re all black.”

Customer: “Oh. The nice ones then.”

Me: *face-palming, because they’re ALL expensive nice pens* “One moment.”

Me: “Okay, the Classique ballpoint is $575 and the Classique rollerball is $595.”

Customer: “Are you sure?”

Me: *sighs inwardly* “Yes, sir, I am holding them in front of me right now.”

Customer: “Oh. Do you have other brands that would be $200 or less?”

Me: *glances at the hundreds of pens in the case* “Yes, sir, but there are literally hundreds of pens.”

Customer: “Well, what do they look like?”

Me: “Sir, like I said, there are literally hundreds of pens. You’d need to come into the store to narrow it down.”

Customer: “Oh.” *click*