(I finally show my mom ‘Monty Python’s Holy Grail’. She seems confused by the jokes, and really didn’t like the movie at all. I am disappointed, but don’t think much of it because I know it isn’t her kind of humor. It is about a week later, and we’re driving on the freeway.)

Mom: *out of nowhere* “Ni!”

Me: *not paying attention* “Excuse me?”

Mom: “NI!”

Me: *thinking I must have misheard her* “Did…did you just say ‘Ni’?”

Mom: *proudly* “Yes! I saw a shrubbery! Right by the side of the road! So I say to you, NI!”

Son: “Dada, what’s your name?”

Husband: “Dada.”

Son: “How old are you?”

Husband: “31.”

Me: *to our son* “How old are you?”

Son: “I’m 32.”

Husband: “No, you’re 3!”

Son: “That’s crap!”

(My brother has been visiting me at my university residence in one of the more outer suburbs. I am now driving him to his residence at a different university in the centre of the city. When he first started university he walked the very far distance with his friend, who later became his girlfriend.)

Brother: “I can’t believe I walked this.”

Me: “Yup. You’re crazy.”

Brother: “And in the middle of the night!”

Me: “Crazy.”

Brother: “In the rain!”

Me: “Like I said, crazy.”

Brother: “Barefoot! In my pyjamas!”

Me: “Very crazy.”

Brother: “With a strange girl I didn’t even know!”

Me: “You realise you’re now dating her, right?”

Brother: “I am crazy!”

(While at a stop light, my mother, who’s driving, is looking through her purse.)

Mom: *commenting on the music* “What are we listening to?”

Me: “OK Go.”

(My mom, without looking up, begins to take her foot off the break.)

Me: “Mom, stop!”

(She stops just in time; we almost rear-ended the car in front of us.)

Me: “What are you doing?!”

Mom: “You told me to go.”

Me: “Mom… that’s the name of the band.”

(We’re no longer allowed to listen to ‘OK Go’ in the car.)

(We are driving in the rain after a day trip to the coast. My wife and I are having the ‘Who-Loves-Who-More’ argument.)

Me: *spreading my arms as far apart as I can without letting go of the steering wheel* “Well, I love you this much!”

Wife: “Well, I love you from here all the way to there!”

(She points at a nearby hill. Less then a second later, the top of the hill is struck by lightning.)

Me: “S***! I guess you win.”