Should Get Yourself Checked Out

(I am the customer in this story. I am notoriously unlucky at using self-service checkouts; they invariably tell me to ‘place the item in the bag’ or ‘remove the last item from the bag’ or can’t recognise the barcodes. For this reason I usually try to use a manned register. On this occasion I’m only buying a few items and decide to give it a try. There is a cashier near the self-service in case of problems.)

Me: “Just to warn you, these checkouts don’t like me. You’ll probably need to help.”

Cashier: “No problem. I’ll wait right here.”

(I start scanning.)

Me: “I can’t believe this is working. It’s usually gone wrong by now.”

Cashier: “Well, keep going. You’re doing something right!”

(I scan my last item.)

Me: “Wow, that is the first time I’ve got through the whole thing without a problem! That’s a record!”

Cashier: “Well, congratulations!”

(I pay the machine and collect my change.)

Me: “I still can’t believe it didn’t go wrong.”

Cashier: “I hope you have a good day!”

Me: “Thanks! Goodbye.”

(I start to leave the store.)

Cashier: “Uh, excuse me?”

Me: “Yes?”

Cashier: *pointing at the checkout I’d just left* “…Did you want to take your shopping with you?”