Curler Me Surprised

| Australia | Related | April 27, 2012

(I dye my hair different colours a lot. I am out with my mum when I see a girl with hair the colour I want.)

Me: “I want to dye my hair that colour.”

Mum: “What? Curly?”

Me: *sarcastically* “Yes, I want to dye my hair curly. It’s my favourite colour.”

Not weird at all

| Related | April 26, 2012

You’re My Number One

| Puyallup, WA, USA | Related | April 26, 2012

Mom: “You know I love you, right?”

Me: “Aww, I love you, too…”

Mom: “…and I need you to go in my closet and see if you can find where the cat peed.”

Needs Imp-plants

| MN, USA | Related | April 26, 2012

(I am a teenage boy with a twin sister, stepbrother, and stepsister all around the same age. My twin sister happens to have very large breasts, while my stepsister has almost nonexistent ones. They make fun of each other constantly.)

Step-sister: “Oh! I named my boobs!”

Me: “You named…your boobs?”

Step-sister: “Uh-huh! This one’s Jessica, and this one’s Tina!”

Twin sister: “You can’t name your boobs. You don’t have any.”

Step-sister: “Don’t make fun of midgets!”

Bitter In Her Resolve

| NY, USA | Related | April 26, 2012

(I’m having a half and half iced tea out of the can. My mom sees the can.)

Mom: “What is that?”

Me: “Half and half.”

Mom: “What?”

Me: “Half-lemonade, half-iced tea.”

Mom: “Let me see that…it looks like beer!”

Me: “It’s just iced tea!”

Mom: “It looks like alcohol!”

Me: “I’ve had two of them already!”

Mom: “That doesn’t tell me anything.”

Me: “I’ve had it before!”

Mom: “That still doesn’t tell me anything.”

Me: “Read the ingredients.”

Mom: “Five percent juice? What’s the other 95%?”

Me: *sighs and rolls eyes* “Taste it then.”

Mom: “No, I don’t want to get drunk!”

Page 1,677/1,773First...1,6751,6761,6771,6781,679...Last