Of Corset Can Breathe

(My boyfriend and I are sitting on his couch so that we face each other. As we talk, I notice he keeps glancing down at my cleavage, which is pushed up by the corset I’m wearing over a low-cut lacy top.)

Me: *snapping my fingers in front of his face* “Hey, I was talking to you.”

Boyfriend: “I know but so were your breasts.”

(He suddenly lunges forward and tries in vain to shove my breasts down into the corset.)

Me: *laughing* “What on earth was that?”

Boyfriend: “Your breasts were crying out to me!” *he speaks in a high-pitched voice* “Help us! We’re being strangled!”

Me: *covering my face with both hands as I shake my head and laugh* “I can’t believe you just did that.”

Boyfriend: *reaches behind me and pulls at my corset laces* “I must save your breasts from suffocating!”