Not Quite Up To Speed

| Working | May 19, 2014

(I’m driving the speed limit on a major road when a cop car, which had been parked on the median, swoops out behind me and turns its lights on. I pull over thinking that I must have a taillight out. I open the window and wait for the police officer to approach.)

Me: “What’s the problem, officer?”

Cop: “You looked like you were going pretty fast back there.”

Me: “What? I was going the speed limit. What did you clock me at?”

Cop: “Well, I didn’t have my radar on but you looked like you were going fast.”

Me: “Wait, what? You didn’t even clock me? What cause do you have to pull me over, then?”

Cop: *realizing he’s made an unlawful stop* “Uh…never mind. Just slow down! *starts jogging back to his patrol car*

Me: *shouting after him* “Hey! HEY! I WANT YOUR BADGE NUMBER!”

(The cop jumped in his car and tore off WAY over the speed limit with his lights on.)

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