Maybe He’ll Be A Late Bloomer

(I work in my students’ union as a receptionist. The university has two main campuses in a city and a town about 20 miles apart. I’m sat at work and a prospective student walks in.)

Prospective Student: “Hi. Where’s the… Oh, it starts with a ‘B?'”

Me: “Brindley?”

Prospective Student: “No, it’s not that.”

Me: “That’s the only academic building on this campus that starts with a ‘B.’ What are you here for?”

Prospective Student: “I’ve got an admissions Interview. I’ve got the letter here.”

(He hands the letter over. Sure enough he’s supposed to be at the other campus, 20 miles away, in half an hour. At the top of the letter it has the full address of the department including the town. Further down it has the time of the interview, the building, and the town the campus is in. At the bottom of the letter in bold capital letters it says ‘please note your interview is at [town campus] not [city campus]’.)

Me: “Okay, so you’re at the wrong campus. You need to go to [Town]. Did you drive here?”

Prospective Student: “No. How do I get there?”

Me: “Well, you can get the train and then a bus which will be at least 40 minutes or the bus which will take an hour but drops you off right at the campus. The next bus is due in a couple of minutes though.”

Prospective Student: “But I’ll be late.”

Me: “Give me your name and the interviewer’s name and I’ll ring and let them know.”

(The guy says thanks and runs for the bus stop. I ring the other campus and try to explain the guy would be late without blaming him too much.)

Interviewer: “Let me stop you there. This guy went to the wrong campus, right?”

Me: “Yup.”

Interviewer: “I don’t know why we bother telling them the.campus in the letter. They don’t pay attention. Oh, well. I’ll see him but if he can’t follow simple instructions written multiple times then he better hope he’s some sort of genius at coding if he wants a hope in hell of getting an offer here.”