I Will Follow You Into The Darkside

| Friendly | April 1, 2016

(I am having a hard time at the New Jedi training academy. It doesn’t help that the only Jedi in existence, Luke Skywalker, is my uncle, and that I am named after another great Jedi, Ben Kenobi, and my mother is a princess and beloved resistance leader. The pressure is so intense that I just can’t take it. Luckily, I have made a new friend called Hux, and after working out that we have some things in common, we meet up to discuss things at a fast food place first thing in the morning when it opens, because that’s, like, so hardcore. We’ve placed our order and we’re sitting down at a table, waiting.)

Me: “So… isn’t everything in the galaxy so lame?”

Hux: “I know, right? The lamest.”

Me: “I just wanna go into my dark place and just die.”

Hux: “That would make a great song.”

Me: “Yeah, it would.”

Hux: “We should start a band!”

Me: “Yeah! Then we could let the whole galaxy know about our pain!”

Hux: “Yeah, but we need a kick-a** name first. Something super intense.”

Me: “Yeah. What should we call our group?”

(At this point the only employee starts calling out to the restaurant.)

Employee: “Someone’s order is ready!”

Hux: “AC-DC3PO?”

Me: “Nah, that’s too metal.”

Employee: *a bit louder this time* “The first order of the day is ready, guys!”

Hux: “My Chemical Bromance?”

Me: “Better, but still not dark enough.”

Employee: “Guys! You’re the first ones here! The first order is ready!”

Hux: “Blaster For My Valentine?”

Me: “Aggressive. I like it, but we need to think bigger.”

Employee: “LAST CALL FOR THE FIRST ORDER!!!”

Hux: “Death Star For Cutie?”

Me: “Almost there…”

Employee: “FIRST… ORDER!”

Hux: “Oh wait! That’s us!”

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