Dealing With A Magic Bean Counter

(One of my tech staff gets off the phone with a loud client. He is visibly frustrated.)

Me: “Next time he calls, put him through to me.”

Tech Staff: “Okay!”

(Minutes later, the call is escalated to me.)

Caller: “This is unacceptable! I demand you fix my issue!”

Me: “Well, unfortunately, you are using an unsupported email client. When you called us to set it up, we explained to you what would happen if you used this client. It appears that you did it anyway. We cannot fix it for you.”

Caller: “That’s unacceptable! We pay you good money to host this for us! I expect you to resolve this for me!”

Me: “Okay, sir. You are a financial advisor to your clients, right?”

Caller: “Yes.”

Me: “So, imagine a customer came to you, and told you they wanted to move all of their investments into magic beans. What would you tell them?”

Caller: “Well, that’s just stupid. I—”

Me: “EXACTLY! So, imagine they did it anyway, and came back to you a few weeks later complaining that they’d lost all of their money. Would you accept liability?”

Caller: “No, but—”

Me: “Well, that’s where I am right now.”

(We never heard from the caller again.)