Another Day At Arkham

(I’m currently studying a healthcare course which allows me to work with a variety of mental health patients in a hospital setting. I’m currently talking to some friends on other courses about how we are being trained how to break away if a patient tries to grab at us.)

Me: “So, yeah, it’s pretty cool, but a little scary to think I could just be grabbed like that! Still though, I think with the training I could handle it safely.”

Friend #1: “So how do you get away if one of them grabs your hair?”

Friend #2: *interrupting* “Oh, it’s actually pretty easy. I got trained, too, years ago!”

Me: *laughing* “Yeah, it’s not too bad; it’s mostly just protecting yourself by moving in circles a lot, like this!” *I mime one of the common moves to push their hands away*

Friend #2: “Yeah, you do that… and then you hit them with an open palm to break their nose!”

Me: “…what?”

Friend #3: “Oh, I know some of these, then you can do this—” *mimes another move* “—to dislocate their shoulder, and then you can go for them easier!”

Me: “Uh, guys?”

Friend #1: “Really? That works?”

Friend #2: “Yeah! You can kick their knees out like this, too!”

(They proceeded to list every move they knew of to hurt and otherwise fight an opponent, and completely ignored me when I said that perhaps wasn’t appropriate with a mental health patient in a hospital.)