Already Lost That Race

(I am at my friend’s apartment, and we’ve been chatting about a lot of random things. Recently, we have moved on to the topic of racing.)

Me: “It would be pretty cool to be in a professional race. I’d be scared, yeah, but can you imagine the speed of those cars?”

Friend: “Yeah, it would. What kinda race do you think you would do?”

Me: “Since it’s hypothetical anyway, why not the Indy 500?”

Friend: “The Indy 500? How long is that?”

Me: “…”

Friend: “…”

Me: “…”

Friend: “Pretend I’m smart.”