A New Way To Face Your Crush

(I am sitting with my friends at lunch, as well as with my sister and her friends. Right next to me is my crush. The fact that I have a crush is well-known, as well as that they aren’t interested. Also, because we don’t have enough chairs to seat everyone, some people are sharing chairs, and people have been stealing each others’ chairs. My crush gets up to get more food.)

Crush: “Okay, if anyone else is sitting in my chair when I get back, I’m just going to sit on you.”

(They leave, the second they are out of sight, I, my sister, and my friend all leap for their chair. My sister gets there first, so I just sit on her. She then pushes me back into my own chair, so I put my head in her lap, on my crush’s chair.)

Sister: “If you do that, [Crush] is going to sit on your face!”

Me: “…”

Sister: *quietly* “Actually, you’d probably like that, wouldn’t you?”