Unfiltered Story #323371

It was the 1990’s and I was working for a computer helpdesk for one particular brand.

You get a lot of quite amusing and also very rude calls.

Here’s a listing of some of the conversations I had.

Me: Helpdesk [Brand] computers.

Client: I understood that I could call you if I have problems.

Me: Only if it concerns your computer, we are not qualified to help you with sexual, religious or social problems.

Cue a sniggering from the caller and the call ends there.

Me: Helpdesk [Brand] computers.

Client: Yes, I have a computer problem and you WILL help me now.

Me: What’s the serial number of the computer involved, please?

Client: [serial number]

Me: Since this serial number is from a computer that was sold 2 years ago and doesn’t qualify for online help, I WILL NOT help you with your problems and I’m going to end this call right now. Bye.

Me: Helpdesk [Brand] computers.

Client: My computer was picked up for service and now I got a message in my mailbox that they tried to return it but we were not home. But we’ve been home all day.

Me: Just one moment, I’ll do some inquiries.

I phone the courier service and ask what the problem is. They tell me that they tried to deliver the computer to the client, but the client refused to accept it because he was not informed that the courier was returning their computer at that specific date and time.

This means that the client has to contact the courier, pay an extra fee to get it delivered or drive 150KM to collect it at their warehouse.

So I get back on the phone and say: “Hello sir? I’ve been checking the status ….”

The client interrupts me with: “Hello, sir, thank you for waiting…”

Me: “Listen jerk, I’ve been busy sorting out the problem that you created. Seems like your only option is to drive 150 KM to the warehouse of the courier service and pay a €165 collecting fee to get your computer back, or leave it as it is and agree that your computer will be scrapped. What’s your pleasure? ”

Client: “You can’t…”

Me: “I just did and I’m about to end this call. What is your pleasure?”

Client: “Give me the address of the warehouse but this will not be the end of this.

Me: Gives address and wishes them best of luck.

A complaint against me was filed, but head office didn’t think I did anything wrong and the client ended up on the blacklist of unwanted clients.