Unfiltered Story #214144

(We’ve had trouble lately with telemarketing calls, and they’re usually recordings so it’s not like I could mess with them if I wanted to. So, I’ve pretty much stopped answering the phone if a number pops up that I don’t know. On this day, however, I was expecting an appointment confirmation, so when a number with my local area code rang in, I decided to answer.)

Me: Hello?
Man: *in a thick, almost fake-sounding southern accent* Yeah, who is this?
Me: Uh, who is THIS?
Man: Oh! Uh…this is John Green calling from Publisher’s Clearing House!
Me: …No you’re not. *click*

(It was almost disappointing, because he wasn’t even trying that hard to stick to his script and if I hadn’t been waiting for that other phone call I would have messed with him for a little while. Oh, well.)