This Just Isn’t CoWorking

(My manager has recently hired a new guy for our department. Despite the fact that he and I have the same job title, he treats me like I’m his personal secretary. I have told him many times that it’s not my responsibility to do his job, yet he keeps on doing it. I have brought it to my manager’s attention several times, but she won’t do anything, so I take matters into my own hands…)

Coworker: “Hey, [My Name]?”

Me: “Yeah?”

Coworker: “Go get me some coffee.”

Me: “Uh, are you serious right now?”

Coworker: “I don’t joke about coffee!”

Me: “Are your legs broken? Have you lost the ability to walk ten feet to the break room?”

Coworker: “Isn’t it your job to do that for me?”

Me: “Excuse me? I’m going to pretend you didn’t say that.”

Coworker: “FINE. I’ll get it myself!” *stomps off*

(30 minutes later…)

Coworker: “Hey, [My Name]?”

Me: “What’s up?”

Coworker: “Can you make ten copies of this for me?” *drops paperwork on my desk*

Me: “No.”

Coworker: “But I’m very busy! I don’t have time to do it myself!”

Me: “You’re so busy that you can’t walk across the hall to the copier, yet you have time to walk over here and order me around?”

Coworker: “But [Manager] said that you would help me!”

Me: “Because you’re new. I’ll help you get adjusted to the company and all the procedural stuff. I know that’s difficult to get used to. Ordering me to get your coffee and make your copies? No. I am very busy too, but I still get up and make my own copies, pour my own coffee, and run my own mail to the mail room, because I am an ADULT.”

Coworker: “UGH!” *stomps off*

(An hour later…)

Manager: “Hey, [My Name], can I see you for a minute?”

Me: “Sure!” *I walk over to my manager’s desk*

Manager: “We need to talk about this behavior you are displaying with [Coworker].”

Me: “MY behavior?”

Manager: “You need to show him more respect. He does not feel appreciated by you.”

Me: “Excuse me? Is he serious?”

Manager: “Let’s discuss this attitude, [My Name]. It’s not nice to talk to him the way you were earlier today.”

(I am about ready to explode, but somehow keep myself in check.)

Me: “[Manager], I will start respecting him when he starts respecting ME as his coworker and equal. You can quote me on that.”

Manager: “Go back to your desk.”

(I transferred to a different department less than a month later. Best decision I ever made.)