These Boots Are Made For Catwalkin’

(My manager has asked me to show a new coworker the ropes. When I go find her, I see that she is wearing very nice, trendy clothes and high-heeled boots.)

Me: Hey, I’m [name]. I’ll be showing you the job today. But, before we start, do you have a pair of boots?”

New Coworker: “Um, I’m wearing them?”

Me: “I meant work boots. Steel toe safety boots are required here. Surely you were told that when you got the job.”

New Coworker: “Well, they said I had to wear boots, so I thought this would be okay.”

Me: “Okay, look: you can’t work in those. I’ll go speak to the supervisor and see if you can start tomorrow instead.”

(I go speak to the supervisor, who agrees that we will send to girl home to buy boots and she can start the next day. Before she leaves, I repeat the requirements to her.)

Me: “Just to make sure we have no more problems, you need WORK boots. Also, you will need to get a hi-vis safety vest if you don’t have one. Plus, this is kinda dirty work. You might want to wear some older clothes that you don’t mind if they get trashed.”

New Coworker: “Yeah, yeah, sure…”

(Despite what I said, when she comes in the next day she is dressed with the same boots and not safety vest in sight.)

Me: “Where are your boots? And the vest? Didn’t you listen to me yesterday?”

New Coworker: “They’re in the car. The boots are ugly, and that bright yellow is not really my color. I’d look horrible in it. I mean, look at you!”

(I’m wearing ripped, worn jeans, a hi-vis polar fleece, work boots, no make-up, and my hair is thrown up in a bun.)

Me: “Yeah, I don’t look my best, but it’s practical. No one here is gonna care what you look like. Now, you need to put your boots and vest on. We’ve wasted enough time with you screwing around.”

(She obliges and puts the correct boots and a vest on. The first job we do involves climbing under a machine, which requires crawling on the ground to clear a jammed line.)

New Coworker: “Eww, I can’t! I’ll get dirty!”

Me: “I told you to wear something appropriate. You’ll know for tomorrow. Now, go make up crates with those guys over there. They’ll show you how.”

(When I came back, what did I find? Her standing around doing nothing, as she was afraid she would break a nail doing crates. Not surprisingly, she only lasted two days.)