That’s How The Managerial Cookie Crumbles

(It’s the week of Christmas, and everyone is in a pretty playful mood. Our manager has taken all of December off for a vacation, so when the mail room tries to deliver her a package, one of my coworkers has to explain that she is unavailable and takes it for her.)

Coworker #1: “Hey, wait! I think this is food!”

(Several people immediately poke their heads out of their cubicles at the sound of the word “food.”)

Coworker #2: “What kind?”

Coworker #1: “I think it’s a cake. It says ‘Perishable’ and ‘Keep refrigerated’. It’s a present from [Manager of Other Department].”

Coworker #3: “Well, [Manager]’s not here. She won’t be back in time to eat it. She wouldn’t want us to waste it, would she?”

Coworker #1: “I can see your point…”

Coworker #2: “So we’re gonna eat [Manager]’s cake?”

Coworker #3: “Hey, guys, come have some of [Manager]’s cake!”

(Coworker #1 opens the package, to reveal a large Italian-style cookie platter.)

Coworker #3: “Not cake… Disappointing, but acceptable.”

Coworker #1: *taking a cookie* “Thanks for leaving, [Manager]!”

Me: “This is the most excited we’ve been in the office all week.”