One Man’s Chocolate Is Another Man’s Poison

(My boyfriend and I are walking through a store when he notices a chocolate fountain on display.)

Boyfriend: “Who would actually buy one of these? You can just rent them.”

Me: “Probably someone who entertains a lot.”

Boyfriend: “But if you owned one then your guests would never leave!”

(Another customer has overheard us and butts in.)

Random Creepy Customer: “Poison! If you poison them then they’ll never come back!”

Boyfriend: “… I guess that’s true.”

(At this point, my boyfriend quickly leads me to another aisle.)

Boyfriend: *whispering* “If you ever see that customer again, don’t eat anything she offers you!”