I have set up a stall at the Christmas Market within the Spedale degli Innocenti’s courtyard, ready to sell my rust-print cloths, which are both unique and fairly expensive. While I’m busy showing off a tablecloth to a customer, I hear my partner shout.

Partner: “No! Go away! Bad dog!”

I turn around and see him waving his “anti-theft staff” around menacingly, placing himself between the napkins pile and a yapping Maltese dog lunging toward them. The dog’s owner is busy having a call.

Me: “Hey there. Can you please rein in the dog before he smacks my things down?”

The owner gasps as she snatches her dog up and holds it away from our sight.

Woman: “How dare you?! She just wanted to say hello!”

Partner: “It was trying to say ‘hello’ by ripping all these cloths to shreds. I had to react.”

Woman: “Well, it’s not like they’re worth much, anyway.” *Points at a napkin* “How much is this worth? I bet I could buy this all with pocket change.”

Me: “The napkins? 40€ each, and the tablecloths are worth 200€. Do you know why? I make these personally with rust powder and ash. They’re unique. They are not puppy pads.”

The woman blushed and ran away without much incident. Still, loose and untrained dogs shouldn’t be allowed out!

Tourist: “Where do we take the bus?”

Me: “Which bus are you looking for?”

Tourist: “The one that goes to our hotel.”

My colleagues and I bought a crystal ball for exactly this reason.

I live in Florence, Italy, and a tourist came up to me once to ask:

Tourist: “Why is every shop selling Pinocchio gadgets?”

That day she learned that Disney didn’t invent this character and that it was formerly a book. She was happy to learn and went along with her day, but to me and my colleagues, it sounded like a really dumb question.

That story always makes me giggle, but I wonder if this woman was really oblivious or the news I gave her was obvious just in Italy.