Cutty Out The Attitude

| | Right | November 23, 2009

(I am working in a kindergarten where over half of the kids are Maori. The Maori word for scissors is ‘kutikuti,’ which is pronounced ‘cutty cutty’.)

Me, to a child: “Can you pass me the kutikuti please?”

Mother: “What did you say to my child?”

Me: “I asked her to pass me the scissors.”

Mother: “Don’t talk baby to my child. She’s smart enough to use adult words.”

Me: “I wasn’t. I was using the Maori name for scissors.”

Mother: “No, you said cutty cutty. That’s not Maori. I’m Maori, and I think I know Maori when I hear it.”

(The child interrupts. She grabs her mom by the hand and drags her off to a poster on the wall which has a few art objects and their Maori names under them.)

Child: “Mom, why do you always have to pick fights with people? I’m very disappointed in you!”

(When her mother left I gave the kid the biggest sticker I could find to put on her good behaviour chart.)

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Twitter Book & T-shirt Contest

| Right | November 23, 2009

Dear Readers,

Win a free copy of Not Always Right’s new book, Not Always Right: Hilarious and Horrific Tales of Customers Gone Wrong just for using Twitter! Even better: you’ll also get a chance to win a free t-shirt from our friends at!

Not Always Right and Business Beware Twitter Contest

Not Always Right and Business Beware Twitter Contest

To enter, simply do the following:

1) Follow Not Always Right and Business Beware on Twitter.

2) Tweet the following line:

Win Not Always Right’s new book and a Business Beware tee! Just follow @notalwaysright and @businessbeware and RT.

That’s it! Just enter before Monday, December 7th, at 11:59 pm PST for your chance to win. We’ll be giving away a total of 10 copies of our book and 10 t-shirts to lucky winners. Good luck!

Not Always Right & Business Beware

How About A Chia Pet Instead

| | Right | November 20, 2009

(I walk up to a customer and her family holding one of our pet store rabbits.)

Me: “So, are you ready to buy that rabbit?”

Customer: “Yeah, I think I’m going to. What do rabbits need?”

Me: “Well, the first thing a rabbit needs is a good home. We have a nice selection of cages start.”

Customer: “I think I’ll just put it in with my guinea pig.”

Me: “Well, that really isn’t a good idea. They should really have separate cages.”

Customer: “Okay, I’ll put the guinea pig somewhere else. What else do rabbits need?”

Me: “Vitamins are good for rabbits, especially younger bunnies who are making their first move–”

Customer: “Can’t I use ferret vitamins?”

Me: “Well, no, because rabbits are herbivores and ferrets are carnivores. They have different nutritional needs.”

Customer, to husband: “I don’t need any vitamins!”

Customer’s husband: “Well, what about food?”

Me: “We have a large assortment of rabbit food. The more colorful ones that contain dried fruits and vegetables are really going to help your rabbit, especially if you don’t plan on feeding it fresh fruits and vegetables.”

Customer: “Can’t I just feed it cat food?”

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Wrong About The Right

| | Right | November 20, 2009

(I’m filling out a return slip for a customer.)

Customer: “Oh! You’re a lefty!”

Me: “Err no, this is my right hand.”

Customer: “But it’s on my left!”

Me: “It’s still my right hand.”

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Third Tail’s A Charm

| | Right | November 20, 2009

Customer: “Hi, I’m planning to stay here for a few days and just wanted to find out whether I can bring pets.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but our hotel has a strict no pet policy.”

Customer: “So I can’t bring my dog?”

Me: “No, I’m afraid not.”

Customer: “But it’s tiny, doesn’t shed, and I guarantee I’ll always let it out in time.”

Me: “No, I’m sorry.”

Customer: “What about my cat?”

Me: “No pets, sir.”

Customer: “Alright, fine.” *stands around for several moments* “So my wife can bring her hamster, right?”

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