Needs A Crash Course In Common Sense

| UK | Right | November 25, 2013

(A customer is involved in a minor collision outside the restaurant, which blocks the narrow road. I go out to help and see that there is glass all over the road. I check to see if both parties are okay. While I talk to them, a car pulls up behind them.)

Me: “Sir, are you okay, are you hurt? Stay there while I call an ambulance.”

Driver #1: “I’m fine thanks, just a bit shaken up.”

Driver #2: “I’m not hurt either, but my windscreen is shattered and we’ll need to call the insurance company.”

(As Driver #2 goes to carry on speaking, the third driver in the car behind butts in.)

Driver #3: “Excuse me, are you guys going to just sit there all day? I have an appointment to get to and you’re not going to make me late!”

Me: “Sorry, but as you can see there has been an accident and I need to check if these people are hurt, and then we will need to move the cars and clear up the glass.”

Driver #3: “How dare you make me late. This is so inconsiderate of your restaurant to allow these people to crash on this road!”

Me: “Well you need to turn around and go the other way, because these people’s needs are much greater than yours right now. And what was the restaurant supposed to do, make them crash in the car park?”

Driver #3: “YES! This is completely ridiculous!”

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He Must Be A Theorist

| USA | Right | November 25, 2013

(I support the scientists in a large research building. I get a call from one of them.)

Caller: “I need help removing my extended absence greeting from my voice mail.”

Me: “Okay, to do that you need to login to your voicemail and select option 4.”

Caller: “How do you do that?”

Me: “You press 4.”

Caller: “I don’t know how to do that. Can I get an onsite visit?”

Me: “We can’t generate an onsite visit for this issue; however, if you go to our intranet site there is a chart with all the menu options.”

Caller: “That’s too complicated.”

Me: “…you’re a scientist with several Ph.D.’s.”

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Got Here At 7:58

| Right | November 25, 2013

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Displacing An Order

| Buffalo, NY, USA | Right | November 25, 2013

(I am at a local Chinese restaurant to pick up food for my office. I have done a lot of business with these folks. The young lady working seems to have trouble with her English. As I wait, another customer walks in the door.)

Customer: “Hi, I’m picking up my order my wife placed 20 minutes ago.”

Worker: “I am sorry. I have no order.”

(The customer starts getting angry, and the worker is getting upset and trying her best to accommodate him.)

Customer: “This is un-f******-believable. You people are ridiculous!”

Worker: “I am so sorry. I will make your food. What did you order?”

Customer: “You people need to get your s*** together. You need to learn how to COMMUNICATE!”

(The customer calls his wife.)

Customer: “Yeah, honey? I’m at [Chinese restaurant] getting our food. They screwed up and didn’t, wait, what? Okay…”

(The customer hangs up, suddenly looking very timid.)

Customer: “Yeah, I’m at the wrong place.”

(I feel the need to comment.)

Me: “Looks like you need to learn how to COMMUNICATE.”

(I then grab my food, tip the worker a comfortable amount, and walk out. I can see the smirk on her face, and the embarrassment radiating from the customer.)

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Unrelated Personal Feelings

| Right | November 25, 2013

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