Indecent Proposal

(I’m quite possibly the least romantic person – ever. My girlfriend of three years is reading a thick book while I’m training. The sun is going down and she starts standing up to go in.)

Me: “[Girlfriend].”

Girlfriend: “Yes?”

(I put a hand in my pocket and pull up a small box and throw at her. She grabs it a bit clumsily and looks at it.)

Girlfriend: “What is…?”

Me: “Open up and see for yourself.”

(She opens the box and sees the ring I bought for her. She quickly puts it on and jump-hugs me.)

Girlfriend: “I will murder you if you try backing out of your proposal.”

Me: “… Proposal? I just wanted to give you a piece of…”

(I see her looking confused at me.)

Me: “Yes! Proposal! It was that! Totally that! Yes, completely! A proposal, of course! It was just that. A proposal.”

(She didn’t mind my ‘explanation,’ and we got married six months ago.)