Disbelieving His Beliefs

(I’m in the sixth grade. I sit down with my friend in my first science class of the year. My teacher enters shortly after. After a brief introduction, he starts a little speech.)

Teacher: “Kids these days; you’ve all been taught the wrong things by your elementary school teachers.”

(The teacher takes out some matches, water, and a $20 bill.)

Teacher: “Why does water put out fire?”

Student: *raises hand* “Water puts out fire because the fire needs ox—”

Teacher: “WRONG!” *lights $20 bill on fire, then pours water on it* “Water doesn’t put out fires because it stops fueling oxygen to the flames. It works because the great god Ahura Mazda says it works!” *takes a paper plane and throws it to the back of the room* “Aerodynamics don’t work because of the laws you’ve all been taught. It works because the great god Ahura Mazda SAYS it works!”

(At this point, everyone’s convinced he’s either completely nuts, or they’ve caught on like I have.)

Me: *whispering to friend* “This guy’s nuts… I like it.”

Teacher: *regains composure* “See what I just told you? Forget it. I was lying. That’ll teach you not to believe everything an adult will tell you.”