You’ve Been Cut Off

(We offer a rough cut panel saw for the guys in the lumber department to make cuts for a few people. At first, we don’t charge the cutting fee — $.25 per cut after two cuts — but after a few people keep walking up for 20, 30, or 40 cuts at a time, we — or rather management — decide to start charging. One day, a student from the art department of the nearby university walks up to the saw with a bunch of wood to cut.)

Student: “I need each of these cut into three four-foot pieces.”

(With the number of boards, and the length, it’s about 14 cuts.)

Me: “You got it.”

(I measure and cut the boards to his wants. After the cuts, I give him a write-up of the cuts.) 

Me: “Okay, here’s your sheet for 12 cuts, as the first two are free!”

Student: “Wait, the first two are free? I thought they were all free!”

Me: “We started charging several months ago. We were supposed to be charging for a while but they started last year. Other stores have actually been charging all along.”

Student: “Well, you could post a sign!”

(I say nothing; I just point to the 8×10 sign behind him that says in big, bold print, “Wood Cutting $.25”!)

Student: “Um, well, you could put up more than ONE!” 

(Again, I say nothing; I just point to another sign on the other side of the saw saying the exact same thing.)

Student: “Aw, s***!”