Your Education Suffers From Your Parents’ Lack Of One

(My friend is in high school and desperately wants to attend [Prestigious University], but she knows how expensive it will be, and she knows that her parents probably can’t afford it.)

Friend’s Dad: “Don’t worry about it. We’ll take care of it.”

Friend: “Really? Are you sure? It’s so much money.”

Friend’s Dad: “No problem. Go ahead and apply.”

(So, she does, and she is accepted. She is beyond thrilled, telling everyone she knows that she will be attending [Prestigious University]. Her job even throws a small party to congratulate her. A few weeks later…)

Friend: “Hey, Dad, I just got a letter from [University] asking for the first semester’s tuition.”

Friend’s Dad: “Well, you’d better get that taken care of, then.”

Friend: “Uh… Sure, but I have to get the money from you, first.”

Friend’s Dad: “Don’t be silly. We don’t have that kind of money.”

Friend: “What?! You said that you’d take care of it!”

Friend’s Dad: “Well, sure, I meant that you need to get a student loan.”

Friend: “…”

Friend’s Dad: “You know, I’ve never understood why everyone complains about the high cost of tuition. All you need is a student loan. It’s free money. People must be stupid!”

Friend: “It’s not free money! Where did you get that idea?”

(Turned out that he somehow missed the “loan” part of “student loan” and literally thought that it was a gift of thousands of dollars that you never had to repay. Long story short: my friend was unable to attend the university of her dreams. She went to a smaller, much less prestigious place.)