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Your Costume Is Streets Ahead

, , , , | Friendly | October 15, 2015

(While taking my little sister Trick or Treating on Halloween one year, I decide to go as the world’s worst bed-sheet ghost by using Sesame Street bed-sheets. It is meant to be funny and I get quite a few laughs out of it, until…)

Three-Year-Old Girl: “Mommy, I don’t want it!”

Mother: “It’s okay, sweetie, it’s just a costume. It’s not a real ghost.”

(She tries to shield her child from me until I pass.)

Me: “One year, I was a bloodstained axe murderer. Not even a whisper behind my back. Then, there was the year I was a zombie from The Walking Dead with my guts hanging out. Everyone passed by like this was normal. And last year, I was a completely accurate nurse from Silent Hill 2, complete with the bloated, disfigured face, twitchy, creepy walk, and a rusty pipe, and not a tear from a single toddler was shed. But then I cut some holes in a bed-sheet covered in Big Bird…!”

Little Sister: *singing* “Can you tell me how to get, how to get to Depressame Street?”

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