You Still Pay Out When There’s A Blackout

Our restaurant’s power cuts out entirely. The restaurant’s hum dies: no music, no buzzing fridges, no lights. The customers are looking around at us and at each other.

Me: *To the dining room customers.* “Sorry, folks! Looks like the power’s out across the block. We can still finish service, but the card machines are down. Cash would be easier, please.”

Immediately, a chorus of complaints rises up.

Customer #1: “Oh, I don’t carry cash.”

Customer #2: “Same here.”

Customer #3: “Who even has cash anymore?”

I sigh. We do have a backup, but it’s a relic from the Stone Age. I grab the old carbon-copy imprinter from under the counter; the chunky thing you slam over the card to get an imprint.

Me: “No problem. Just pop your card here and we’ll run it through later.”

I swipe the imprinter across one customer’s card. The loud, scraping ka-chunk sound echoes through the room.

Customer #2: *Eyes wide.* “Wait… what are you doing with my card?!”

Me: “This is how we’re going to take down your credit card details so we can process the payment later.”

Customer #2: “But I don’t want my credit card details written down.”

I say nothing. There’s a pause. Then, like magic, people start patting pockets, digging through purses, running to their cars.

Customer #1: *Returning, sheepish, holding bills.* “Uh… turns out I did have cash after all.”

Customer #3: *Handing me a twenty.* “Yeah, me too. Must’ve slipped my mind.”

Customer #4: *Jogging back in from the parking lot, clutching cash.* “Guess I had some emergency money stashed away.”

Within minutes, every single “cashless” diner has somehow “discovered” cash. The imprint machine sits unused on the counter. We’ve never had to use it for its intended purpose, but it sure is a great lie detector!