You Say Tomato, I Say Scam

(My roommate and I are at a fast food restaurant with two names, depending on which region you live in. They are known for having left and right drive-thru lanes as well as walk up windows. I drive up to the speaker in the left lane that requires the passenger to pay at the window and collect the food, but the driver orders at the speaker. Important to note: their burgers are always pre-made, so when you ask for something to be left off, they just pull it off unless you mention an allergy. Horrible, I know. But they’re open super late, and it’s slim pickings for someone that gets off work at midnight.)

Cashier: “Order when you’re ready.”

Me: “We have two separate orders. For the first one, I have a coupon for [some meal deal], small, Coke to drink, please. No tomato. For the second order, we have the same coupon. Small, cherry Coke.”

Cashier: “All right, I’ll have your totals at the window when I get the coupons. Please pull forward.”

(As I’m pulling up, my roommate turns to me.)

Roommate: “Can I have your tomato for my sandwich?”

Me: “Absolutely, I hate those things. Cancel the no tomato for mine and ask them to put it on yours when we get up there.”

Roommate: *to cashier at the window* “Can you please put her tomato on my sandwich instead of tossing it?”

Cashier: *stares for a moment* “Uh… I’d have to charge you for it.”

(We both just stare at him, hoping he will realize how ridiculous that is…. He does not.)

Roommate: “You’re going to toss it. Instead of tossing it in the trash, toss it on my burger. Why would you charge me for that? I guess I can understand if it’s restaurant policy not to put it on another order or something…”

Cashier: “We don’t have a policy like that. But you’re asking me for extra tomato, I have to charge. You can’t get something extra for nothing.”

Me: “We aren’t asking for extra… Just… forget the no tomato on my order. Leave it on, please.” *to my roommate* “I’ll pass it to you when we drive away, then. This is kind of silly.”

Cashier: *overhearing* “Then I still have to charge you for the extra tomato on her sandwich. That’s how it works.”

Roommate: “Don’t you dare! What are you missing here? Two [meal deals] just as they come, no modifications, please and thanks. That’s it, really.”

Cashier: “Oh, okay!” *rings us up and hands her the bag through the window*

Both: *in unison* “Thanks!”

(Before I pulled off I opened the bag, unwrapped both burgers, and placed my tomato slice on her sandwich. We both smiled at the cashier, who was staring with disbelief, and I drove off.)