You Need To Be Crazy To Live There

(My coworker is looking for a new apartment. It’s a slow day, so I’m helping her search. I’m a bit of a history and horror fan.)

Me: “Oh, here’s a nice apartment complex. Great location, beautiful apartments, a pool, gym, and pet-friendly.” *sends link* “Take a look.”

Coworker: “Wow, these are super nice! Really expensive, though. And the building looks kinda gothic.”

Me: “Yeah, it used to be a mental hospital.”

Coworker: “…what?”

Me: “Yeah, look it up. It was an asylum from 1878 to 1989. It’s where the lobotomy was perfected, and it’s the place that influenced H.P. Lovecraft and the Arkham Asylum from Batman. After it shut down, someone bought it and decided to turn it into apartments. They tore down most of it, but kept the façade of the original building.”

Coworker: “So there’s, like, an 80% chance it’s haunted.”

Me: “Probably.” *I do some more reading* “Oh! The graveyard is still there, right on the property!”

Coworker: “There’s a graveyard?”

Me: “Yeah, it’s where they buried the patients. Most of the graves only have the patient’s room number. Not even a name.”

Coworker: “So, it used to be an insane asylum, plus there’s a graveyard on the property full of the unmarked graves of dead mental patients?”

(We both go quiet.)

Me: “Yeah, it’s guaranteed to be haunted. I’ll look somewhere else.”

Coworker: “I’m not sure I want you looking at all!”