You Can’t Threaten The Life Of Someone Who Is Dead Inside

I’m delivering pizzas and I get one on the southern border in an area I haven’t been to before. The note says to honk twice when I’m outside. I arrive and realize there are no streetlights around, making my headlights the only way I can see and do what the note says. Two guys walk out in front of me and one guy walks behind my car.

Guy #1: “Give me your money and the pizza.”

I’m tired, and I know I only have $20 on me as is company policy.

Me: “Your total is [amount]; do you need any bills broken?”

Guy #1: “Didn’t you hear me?”

Me: “Your total is [amount].”

Guy #1: “I’m just joking around. How did you know I wasn’t gonna rob you?”

Me: “You’re not the first person to joke around like that.”

After six months of delivering in that area, a total of six people had joked about robbing me, and one guy actually tried.