You Can’t Scam A Scammer

, , , | Working | November 5, 2020

I’ve been spammed by telemarketers for years now. I have been on the do-not-call list ever since the list got implemented, but people still call me. I’ve tried everything to get myself removed: asking nicely, asking firmly, everything but cussing the caller.

Lately, when picking up, I pretend to be hard of hearing and to speak very little Dutch, and it makes the calls end a lot faster and the calls seem to be dwindling. One day, I get a call from an unknown number, so I prepare my voice.

Me: “’Ello?”

Since it’s only one word, I can shift easily if it turns out to be a genuine call.

Caller: “Hello, I am calling from [Company]. I noticed that you have a company on your address and I wish to offer you our business services.”

No, he did not check my name or whatever.

Me: *Slightly louder* “Wha?”

Caller: “I am with [Company] and I noticed that you have a company registered on your address.”

Me: “Who you want?”

Caller: “I am with…” *sighs* “Is this the number of Mr. or Mrs. [My Name]?”

Me: “I dunno them!”

Usually this ends the conversation.

Caller: “Well then, who are you?”

Me: *Slightly taken aback* “Why you wanna know?”

Caller: “Look, I’m calling from [Company].”

Me: “I am not with a company!”

Caller: “Yes, you are! This is [my address], right?”

Me: “No?” 

Caller: “Then who am I speaking with?!”

Me: “I don’t know them! I am not with a company!”

Caller: “Ugh, fine. They probably gave a wrong number. I’ll put that down, then. Bye!”

Me: “Have a nice day! Bye!”

This was the first time the trick didn’t work and boy, the dude was rude to this “sweet old lady”!

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