You Can Win The Battle But Lease The War

(This takes place just when DVDs are starting to replace VHS. A customer comes to the counter with a popular movie on VHS.)

Me: “You know, sir, the rental costs $4.99 for a week, but we are selling previously rented copies of this movie for only $1.99.”

Customer: “That’s okay. I just want to rent it.”

Me: “But sir, it’s $3 cheaper if you buy it, and you won’t have to bring it back.”

Customer: “But I don’t want to keep it!”

Me: “Well, you could buy it and then throw it out after.”

Customer: *impatiently* “Look, I don’t want to buy anything. I just want to rent this movie!”

Me: *gives up* “Certainly, sir. That will be $5.14 with taxes. The movie is due back next Tuesday by midnight.”

Customer: “Great! Thanks!”