Yo Ho Ho And A Bottle Of Annoying

I’m picking up a few groceries and a bottle of rum at a packed store. There are three people ahead of me. I’m only twenty-eight and everyone constantly tells me I look half my age. I know that the cashier will need to see my ID; I try to pull out my debit card and license while I’m waiting my turn. Unfortunately, after spending the few minutes I’m in line looking, I discover that I am missing my ID. The line behind me has grown exponentially. I address the cashier as soon as she is finished with the customer ahead of me, in an attempt to not waste anyone’s time.

Me: “I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to pass on the rum; I just realized that I misplaced my ID.”

Cashier: “I need to see your ID for the liquor.”

Me: “I know. I thought I had it, but I can just put it back.”

Cashier: “I do believe you that you’re old enough, but I do need to check, or I can get in trouble.” 

Me: “I know, I just realized after I got in line that I do not have it. I have a bad habit of not putting it back in my wallet after I use it. I do not have a problem coming back for the rum later, after I find it.”

Cashier: “I’m sorry, but I can not sell you this without seeing your ID.”

Me: “I understand. I can just skip it.”

She has not rung out a single one of my items, and I’m getting frustrated. I realize forgetting my ID is my fault but mistakes happen, and I told her at the beginning of the transaction that I was aware that I would not be able to purchase the rum. I cannot understand why she is trying to argue with me about it. Finally, she picks up the rum after wasting about two minutes asking for my ID.

Cashier: “Since you do not have ID, I’m going to have to put this behind the counter to be put back.”

After placing the bottle behind the counter, she finally starts to ring up my groceries.

Me: “Thanks for putting that back for me. Most likely my ID is in my car, but I didn’t want to hold up the line trying to run out and grab it.”

After only ringing up one item, she stops.

Cashier: “You know you cannot drive without a license.”

Me: “I know you’re not supposed to, but until I got in line, I thought mine was in my wallet. I’m sure it’s in my car or I’ll find it when I get home. It’ll be fine.”

Cashier: “If you get pulled over, you’ll go to jail for driving without a license.”

She has still only rung up one of my items, despite the fact that I have been at the front of the line for several minutes, and I am beyond frustrated.

Me: “I understand. I just realized it was missing after I got in line. I doubt I’m going to get pulled over in the two minutes it will take me to drive home. Can you please just ring me up, so I can go home and find my missing ID?”

Cashier: “Okay, but you can’t drive home without your license. You’ll need to walk or have someone come get you.”

I have given up and just stare at her.

Cashier: “You can’t drive without a license.”

I continue to just stare at her silently. After about thirty seconds of awkward silence, she reaches over and starts ringing up the rest of my groceries. After she finally starts to ring up my groceries, the transaction takes about one minute. I look apologetically at the now extremely long line behind me as I grab my one bag of groceries.

Me: “Thanks, have a great day.”

As I walk away, the cashier, ignoring the man that is next, takes a few steps toward me away from the register.

Cashier: “Don’t forget that you can’t drive home without a license.”

I just rolled my eyes and left the store. She continued to yell about my missing ID as I walked away, still ignoring the man that was in line behind me looking as frustrated as I feel. I got into my car and drove home without incident and found my ID after I got there.