Your Cat Is Heartless

(I work part-time at a vet’s office. On this particular day, I’ve brought my extremely friendly cat in for his annual check-up after I’ve gotten done with classes. The doctor is, of course, my boss, and he has quite a sense of humor.)

Doctor: *puts on stethoscope, holds it to my cat’s chest*

Doctor: *frowns and gives my cat a few firm finger-pokes to the shoulder*

Doctor: *raps the table sharply with his knuckles*

Me: “Trying to get him to stop purring?”

Doctor: “Yeah.” *takes off stethoscope* “Well, I’m just going to assume there’s a heart in there somewhere.”

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