Wouldn’t Be Caught Dead With This Customer

(I work as a customer service manager at a store. A clearly drunk guy barges into the store right before closing. He tries to buy alcohol.)

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but we can’t sell you that right now.”

Customer: *loudly* “I WILL HAVE YOU ALL DEAD!”

(I then called security to get him out. This happened six years ago and I am not dead yet.)