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Bad boss and coworker stories

Drunk Coworkers Can Be A Heave-y Burden

| Working | December 15, 2012

(On this day, I have a 5 am start with two other people. One of these is in the grill, while my coworker and I are covering service in drive-through and counter.)

Coworker: “Ugh, I’m so tired.” *sits on the floor*

Me: “Well, at least you only have to do the cloth buckets.”

Coworker: “But I don’t want to. I’m so tired.”

Me: “Why are you tired?”

Coworker: “I’ve come straight from a night out, and I’m still drunk. Can’t you do them?”

(My coworker ended up vomiting in the rubbish bin and being sent home. I essentially had to do two jobs and cover the entire service area.)

This Company’s Days Are Numbered

| Working | December 15, 2012

(I’m at home watching TV when I receive a call on my cellphone. I’m a girl.)

Representative: “Hello, I’d like to speak with Mr. [name].”

Me: “I’m sorry; this is not his number.”

Representative: “Is the number [number]?”

Me: “Yes, it is, but this not his number.”

Representative: “But you know him?”

Me: “No, I don’t know him.”

Representative: “Are you his wife?”

Me: “No, I told you I don’t know the guy. I’ve never heard of him. This is not his number; it’s mine.”

Representative: *rudely*This is the number I have on the system. Did you buy the phone recently?”

Me: “No, this is my number, and I’ve had it for over 7 years. He must have made a mistake when he gave you the number.”

Representative: “No, he gave us the number a couple of days ago and we confirmed it.”

Me: “Well, then I don’t know what to say. This is not his number.”

Representative: “Anyway, you have to tell him he owes us $[amount] and he has to come pay it by tomorrow!”

Me: “Excuse me, but what part of ‘This is not his number’ and ‘I don’t know him’ do you not understand?”

Representative: “Anyway, be sure to tell him that when you see him!”

(Despite my attempts to explain my situation multiple times, this went on for days!)

So Much For Out-Of-The-Books Thinking

| Working | December 14, 2012

(It’s the holidays, and I have a seasonal job as a cashier at a large, national bookstore. To reiterate, I am a cashier, which means I am stationed at the cash register. There are floor associates, who walk the floor and help customers find items. The following happens while I’m off the clock on my lunch break.)

Customer: “Excuse me, do you work here?”

Me: “Yes, I do.”

Customer: “Great, I was just hoping you could point me in the right direction. I’m looking for Monty Python’s Best of John Cleese.”

(Note: This would have cost her about $15. I’m also a HUGE fan of Python and British comedy in general.)

Me: “Ah, I’m sorry! We actually just sold that earlier today. If you’d like, [coworker] can order that for you and we can have it in about two weeks.”

Customer: “Oh. I really wanted to give it to my boyfriend for his birthday tonight. Do you have any suggestions?”

Me: “Yes, actually! BBC has just released a box set that contains all of the Python episodes plus tons of bonus materials. We also have this 365 Days of Python tear-away calendar.”

(The customer buys the box set ($200), the calendar ($20), and a compilation of best British stand up ($20). So, she ends up spending about $240 when she’d planned to spend only $15. However, my manager grabs me on my way back to the break room.)

Manager: “What are you doing?! You are a cashier. There are people here whose job is to talk to the customers. Go do your job!”

Me: “Um, I just talked a customer into spending FIFTEEN TIMES the amount of money she’d intended to. And you’re upset about this sale?”

Manager: “It’s not your job!”

Me: “Serving customers is not my job in this customer service position? Really?”

Manager: “YOU’RE A CASHIER! GO BACK TO YOUR REGISTER!”

Me: “I’M OFF THE CLOCK! And you’re welcome for the TWO HUNDRED FORTY DOLLAR SALE that [coworker] wouldn’t have been able to make because he doesn’t know the genre.”

(Needless to say, my seasonal job did not turn into a long-term position. This large, national bookstore chain collapsed under bankruptcy and closed last year. I was neither sad nor surprised. At my current job, if an employee makes a $200+ sale, we get a certificate of recognition and a 40% discount on an entire purchase!)


This story is included in our Lunch Break story roundup!

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Oh, Good Heavens

| Working | December 14, 2012

(My boyfriend is having a conversation with a coworker regarding the then-new scandal about Rupert Murdoch.)

Coworker: “Have you heard about this new scandal about the News of the World?”

My Boyfriend: “Oh, you mean about that guy who owns The Sun?”

Coworker: “What?”

My Boyfriend: “You know, he owns The Sun newspaper.”

Coworker: “Oh! I thought you meant…” *flicks her eyes up to the sky*

The Mark-Up Of The Beast

| Working | December 14, 2012

(I’m making a small purchase at a local convenience store. With my purchases, I am using a $1 off coupon. Before the coupon is applied, my total comes to $6.66.)

Cashier: “That will be $5.66, please.”

Me: “Okay.” *makes payment*

(The cashier prints my receipt and notices the pre-coupon total for the first time.)

Cashier: “Oh, it’s a good thing you used that coupon. It had been $6.66. You would’ve had to have bought something more!”

Me: “No, it’s fine. I’m not superstitious.”

Cashier: “Well, I am. I wouldn’t have allowed that on my machine. I would’ve made you buy something else!”

Me: *speechless*