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Bad boss and coworker stories

Missed Opportunities

| Working | December 17, 2012

(I’m currently on the line with a male representative. Please note that I am female.)

Representative: “Can you please state your name for me?”

Me: “Yes, it’s [name].”

Representative: “Thank you, Mrs. [name]. Let me look into your account for you.”

Me: “Okay, cool, but it’s Miss, not Mrs. I’m not married.”

Representative: “Oh, I’m sorry about that.”

Me: “Me too.”

Bureau-crazy, Part 4

| Working | December 17, 2012

(When my son was 18 months old, I went to the passport office to request a passport for him. At that time, the rule was that a doctor needed to validate the identity of the person and certify that he knew the person for two years. I’m at the security guard desk who’s checking my documents.)

Guard: “Who signed the picture?”

Me: “[Doctor’s name], a surgeon.”

Guard: “How long has that doctor known the person?”

Me: “Well, my son is 18 months old, so 18 months.”

Guard: “You need someone who knows the person for two years.”

Me: “Well, it’s impossible. My son is 18 months old.”

Guard: “You need to find someone that knows your son for at least two years.”

Me: *giving up* “Okay, then. Dr. [name] has known my son for two years.”

Guard: “Okay, go on to stall #2!”

 

A Funny Resolution

, , , , | Working | December 17, 2012

(I am working the New Year’s Eve to New Year’s Day graveyard shift. A man comes in at 12:15 am.)

Customer: “How fresh is that coffee?”

Me: “Well, it was made last year.”

Customer: *laughs and gets a large*


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Security Shouldn’t Be So Elementary

| Working | December 16, 2012

(The banks in my area have all recently remodeled to look more “modern.” However, the layout is a bit weird, and the tellers are no longer behind a counter. I’m a customer in line behind another customer.)

Other Customer: “So… they’re just as kiosks now. And you stand right next to the teller?”

Me: “Yeah. I don’t know how their security consultant approved it.”

Other Customer: “And a few kiosks are back to back, so you could just… you know…”

Me: “…Turn around and see someone else’s banking info? Plus, you know, NO protection for the tellers. I guess they think it looks better, but really it probably worries a lot of customers.”

Other Customer: “It does. You a security consultant?”

Me: “I’m in high school.”

Other Customer: “You want to design county banks? I’ll put in a word.” *flashes his police badge* “The whole force is nervous about their security right now!”

Me: “…Should you be telling me this?”

Other Customer: “Kid, you were already thinking most of it!”

Of Microwaves And Microbrains

| Working | December 16, 2012

(One of my coworkers was not the brightest bulb in the box. He comes in one day with some leftovers in a paper box that has a metal handle. He puts it in the store’s industrial microwave and walks away. When I smell smoke, I rush over to the microwave as my coworker comes back over.)

Coworker: “What’s going on?”

Me: “You put metal in the microwave.”

Coworker: “So?”

Me: “You aren’t supposed to do that.”

Coworker: “I’m not?”

Me: “Haven’t you ever heard you don’t put metal in the microwave?”

Coworker: “No?”

Me: “…Okay, you’re not allowed to use the microwave anymore.”