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Bad boss and coworker stories

Bad Customer Service Can’t Be Helped

| Working | July 25, 2012

(I call my insurance company to know the procedure to file a claim. The mailing address with my file is my mother’s address, as she’s the one paying for it. Note: I live 12 hours away from my mother.)

Me: “…And how do I get the forms to fill out?”

Employee: “You’re going to have them by mail in a few days.”

Me: “Can you send them at a different address than the one listed in my file? I don’t currently live there.”

Employee: “I already sent it, so I can’t do anything about it.”

Me: “Couldn’t you send it again to a different address? I really can’t get there to pick the forms. It’s a 12 hour road trip for me.”

Employee: *pissed off* “No! Go download it!”

Me: “I didn’t find it on your website. Can you tell me how to access it exactly?”

Employee: “Search better!”

Me: “Uh… thanks for your help. Can you tell me how much money I’m going to have for the hospitalization and the days without working afterwards?”

Employee: “Five days or less. It’s at three times five, and 10 days or less, so it’s at two times three.”

Me: “…Huh?”

Employee: “Do you need an example to understand better?!”

Me: “Yes, please.”

Employee: *very unpleasant* “Goodbye and have a nice day!” *hangs up*

The Pig Goes Moo

| Working | July 25, 2012

(I work at a call center. I enter the break room to make my lunch. Two of the administrative assistants are present.)

Coworker #1: *to me* “Hey, you. Did you notice the new bacon item in the vending machine?”

Me: “Yeah, it’s pretty good, but for a buck for .3 ounces, you’d make out better cooking your own at home.”

Coworker #2: “Wait, there’s bacon in the vending machine? Doesn’t it need to be cooked?”

Me: “No, it’s precooked. The vending guy just filled it again. There had been six, but now there’s only three left.”

Coworker #2: “But why would you buy it? Doesn’t it need to be cooked? It’s gotta be fake! How big is it?”

Me: “Less than a tablespoon.”

Coworker #2: “Well, I’d never buy it. I can’t eat carbs. Plus, bacon is the scraps of the cow.”

Me: “Bacon is pork, which is pig, and meat is protein.”

Coworker #2: “NO! Bacon is cow carbs!”

Not Feeling Good About This Boss

| Working | July 25, 2012

(We have a new supervisor in our lingerie department. She is very bossy, but doesn’t really know much about the job despite having completed training. We’re all long-standing staff members and know how the department runs. On this day, only my supervisor and I are working; she has pretty much stood around on the tills all day while I run around serving just about every customer.)

Supervisor: “[My Name], this customer wants a bra fit. Are there any changing rooms free?”

Me: “Sorry, but I’m already doing three fittings and I really can’t take on any more. There’s a room free though if you want to do it.”

Supervisor: “Ah… how long will it take until you’re free? I’m not really confident.”

Me: “I really can’t say. One’s almost done but the other two might take a little while.”

Supervisor: “Okay, I’ll tell her to take a seat. You can call her in when you’re free.”

(I eventually get to the customer the supervisor won’t help, who at this point has been waiting almost 30 minutes.)

Me: *to customer* “Okay, I’m done. Would you like to come through?”

(I fit the customer relatively quickly, as she is wearing close to her size and doesn’t want anything specific. She goes away happy with my service, but annoyed she had to wait so long. I talk to my supervisor again.)

Me: *to my supervisor* “You know, you can do the fittings too if the floor’s quiet. You don’t need to stand on the till the whole time if there’s no one waiting to pay. There are three more tills round the corner they can go and pay at if we’re too busy to serve. I can help you and if you get stuck, I can take over or help you without making someone else wait.”

Supervisor: “I know, but… you know, there are days I like doing fittings, and days I don’t. I just didn’t feel like it today.”

Me: “So, you made that poor lady wait half an hour because you ‘didn’t feel like it’?”

Supervisor: “Well… yeah!”

Me: *facepalm*

The Ultimate Relativity Machine

| Working | July 24, 2012

(Note: A telemarketer is trying to get me to switch internet providers.)

Telemarketer: “…Yes, sir, but our internet’s speed is far higher.”

Me: “Your speed is 10 Mbps.”

Telemarketer: “10 Mbps, but it isn’t the same 10 Mbps of [competitor]!”

Me: “10 Mbps is 10 Mbps. Let’s say I’m in my car, and I drive at 100 km/h. My brother is in his own car, also driving at 100 km/h, and you’re telling me it’s not the same speed?”

Telemarketer: “But, um… let’s say you have an… I don’t know, um… a Toyota… and he has a BMW.”

Me: “Right, I have a Toyota, and he has a BMW, we both are driving at 100 km/h. Isn’t that the same 100 km/h?”

Telemarketer: “But who will arrive home faster?”

Me: “I promise you that if we both travel at 100 km/h, we’ll arrive at exactly the same time.”

Telemarketer: “I’m sure you would not!”

Me: “What? How are you sure we won’t?”

Telemarketer: “Won’t the BMW arrive before the Toyota?”

Me: “Not if we both travel at 100 km/h!”

Telemarketer: “Isn’t the BMW’s speed higher than the Toyota’s because the vehicle is better?”

Me: “Speed? The speed is 100 km/h. 100 km/h is 100 km/h.”

Telemarketer: “I give up. Just contact us when you get your math straight!”

The Best-Laid Plans Of Mice And Managers

, | Working | July 24, 2012

(I’m working my first job at a fast food restaurant while still in high school. I’ve made it clear on my application that I can not work Tuesday and Thursday nights due to band rehearsals. Despite this, my manager repeatedly schedules me exclusively for these times, which leads to the following conversation.)

Me: “I need to get my schedule changed for this week, and for next week.”

Manager: “Why? You’ve come to ask me to change your schedule every week for a month. Why can’t you work when you’re scheduled?”

Me: “As I’ve made it clear on my application, and have reminded you since, I can not be here Tuesday and Thursday evenings. I’m in high school, and I have band rehearsal those nights.”

Manager: “What? You never told me that!”

(I point out several notes conspicuously taped to her door and computer.)

Me: “I’ve written you notes, reminding you that I can’t work those days, because you won’t deal with me in person. This needs to stop.”

Manager: “You should have specified!”

(Next, I point at a hand-drawn calendar which I created specifically at her request.)

Me: “You asked me to make you a calendar of dates that I could and couldn’t be here because of this issue. I wrote out a calendar for the entire semester because you asked me to. Why are you scheduling me when I have specifically asked you not to?”

Manager: “I can’t read that d*** thing!”

Me: “I’m really sorry for that, then. What’s wrong with it?”

Manager: “YOU PUT SUNDAY AT THE BEGINNING OF THE WEEK! I CLEARLY CAN’T READ THAT PIECE OF S*** CALENDAR!”