(My father and I are driving home one night when he sees a driver driving erratically down the road. He is concerned that there is an accident risk, so he calls 911 using the car’s phone linkup. Note for the record that my father used to be a cops reporter and is very familiar with emergency services.)

Operator: “911, what is your emergency?”

Father: “I’m driving down [Street] and there’s another car swerving on and off the road and between lanes. I think the driver might be drunk. It’s a black [Brand] SUV, license plate [Numbers] WVY; William Victor Young.”

Operator: “You know this person? How long have you known Mr. Young?”

Father: “Really?”

(To our knowledge, they never did catch that driver!)

(My brother and I are customers at a fast food place and overhear an interaction between a manager and an employee, who has Down Syndrome.)

Manager: *semi-angrily* “What are you eating?”

Employee: “Nothing…”

Manager: “I can see you eating something; what are you eating?”

Employee: “Nothing!”

(At this point my brother and I become uncomfortable because we think the employee is being yelled at for either eating product, or just eating while on the clock.)

Manager: “Is it a Rice Crispy treat? It’s a Rice Crispy treat, isn’t it?”

Employee: “…yeah.”

Manager: “Is it sugar free? It better be sugar free.”

Employee: “It is!”

Manager: “I don’t think it is. You know you aren’t supposed to have sugar. It can make you really sick!”

(My brother and I relax, and as we walk out to the car we talk about how relieved we were that we were just watching a concerned coworker rather than the employee getting in real trouble!)

(I am interviewing a young college student for an entry level job. She’s wearing sweatpants and flip flops with a baggy shirt, and her hair’s a mess. Per the rules, we must reject any applicant who comes wearing inappropriate interview attire, even for entry level, so I do. My boss comes over to talk to me a short while later.)

Boss: “About her, did she really look that bad?”

Me: “Well, she looked like she had just rolled out of bed in old wrinkled clothes, and hadn’t bothered to brush her hair or groom at all.”

Boss: “Really? Because her resume is very good. I can’t believe someone with such a great resume would do that.”

Me: “Well, you told me that appearance is important when judging applicants.”

Boss: *snappish* “Yes, I know what I told you, but you should’ve hired her anyway! Did you even look at her resume?”

(Long story short, he overrode me, hired her anyway, and fired me… for following HIS rule! Idiocy must be a prerequisite for bosses.)

(I’ve been so swamped at work that I forgot to put out a group birthday card for an employee’s milestone birthday, as is customary at my workplace. The reason I’ve been swamped at work is people have been no-call, no-showing on an incredibly frequent basis.)

Me: “Oh, no, I forgot to get a birthday card for [Unreliable Employee]!”

Coworker: “Well, [Unreliable Employee] forgot to come to work.”

(I call a local taxi service on a Sunday when buses aren’t running. A man answers.)

Man: “Do you need a taxi?”

Me: “Yes, I do—”

Man: “Too bad!” *hangs up*