Change Can Be Difficult, Part 3

, | Working | February 21, 2013

Employee: “Hi. What can I get you?”

Me: “I’ll have a two burrito meal, please.”

Employee: “What size?”

Me: “Large.”

(At that moment, a manager comes up and tells the employee they can only do a medium meal.)

Employee: “Oh, I’m sorry, sir. We only have a medium.”

Me: “That’s fine.”

(The manager proceeds to tell the employee how to work the cash register and at that moment, I realize that the employee is new.)

Employee: “Is there anything else, sir?”

Me: “Yes. I’d like a large peppermint hot chocolate.”

(My total is $5.70, so I take a 20 dollar bill out of my wallet and hand it to the employee.)

Employee: “Your change is $5.70.”

Me: “…My change is $5.70?”

Employee: “I’m sorry. I meant your total is $5.70.”

Manager: “He’s new here.”

Me: *laughing* “Oh, that’s alright. If my change actually was $5.70, I’d say the register was trying to short change me.”

(I give the 20 dollar bill to the cashier and see that my actual change is $14.30.)

Employee: “Okay, your change is $4.30.”

Me: “…My change is $4.30?”

Employee: *laughs* “I mean your change is $14.30!”

 

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Look Who’s Taco-ing

| Working | February 21, 2013

(I’m going past security at a courthouse.)

Guard #1: “Man, I could use some tacos. ”

Guard #2: “They do sound pretty good right now.”

Guard #1: *to me* “Hey Miss, don’t you think tacos sound good?'”

Me: “It’s 9 am. I think it’s a little early for tacos.”

Guard #1: *deadpan* “It’s never too early for tacos.”

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So-duh Can Make You Pop

, | Working | February 20, 2013

(My family and I are in Wichita Falls, visiting my aunt and uncle. We’re thirsty and decide to swing by a popular fast food place to get drinks since we’re going to drive by it anyway. Note: There are six of us in the car.)

Drive-thru Worker: “Hello, welcome to [restaurant]. May I take your order?”

Uncle: “Yes, we’d like two medium Cokes, two medium Diet Cokes, a medium Sprite, and a medium Dr. Pepper with no ice.”

Drive-thru Worker: “Uh-huh… so, three Cokes?”

Uncle: “No. Two medium Cokes, two medium Diet Cokes, a medium Sprite, and a medium Dr. Pepper with no ice.”

Drive-thru Worker: “Oh. So, four Cokes?”

Uncle: “No! Two medium Cokes, two medium Diet Cokes, a medium Sprite, and a medium Dr. Pepper with no ice.”

Drive-thru Worker: “Okay. So four Cokes and Sprite? Five drinks?”

All Six Of Us: “Six!”

Uncle: “It’s two medium Cokes, two medium Diet Cokes, a medium Sprite, and a medium Dr. Pepper with no ice.”

Drive-thru Worker: “Oh! And Dr. Pepper with dry ice?”

Aunt: *groans and facepalms*

(We eventually got the drinks, but we’ve decided to just buy soda at the gas station from now on.)

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Drugged Up By Honesty

, | Working | February 20, 2013

(I place a bottle of lactase enzyme on the counter.)

Me: “Hi, I just need this, please.”

Employee: “Sorry, we don’t have that.”

Me: “Uh, what?”

Employee: “We don’t have that in stock at the moment. I could order it for you, though. We’ll probably have it by next week.”

Me: “Actually, I got that from the fridge just now. I just want to pay for it.”

Employee: “Oh!” *laughs* “I’m so sorry! I thought it was an old one you’d brought with you to show me what you needed. That’ll be [price].”

Me: *grins* “One of those days, huh?”

Employee: “Oh, you bet. I’m just glad you’re honest. You could have walked out of here with that bottle and I would never have suspected a thing!”

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Where There’s Smoke, There’s Getting Fired, Part 3

| Working | February 20, 2013

(I work at the meat/seafood counter at my store. We have two steamers that we use to cook crab, fish and shrimp for customers who ask us to. One of the steamers broke down a few days ago and has a huge sign taped to the front of it that says “BROKEN. DO NOT USE.”)

Coworker: “Can I help you, sir?”

Customer: “Yeah, can I get five pounds of snow crab steamed with [seasoning]?”

Coworker: “Okay, it’ll be five minutes.”

(He weighs out the customer’s order and takes it to the back. He doesn’t even notice the huge sign and shoves the steamer tray right into the broken steamer and turns it on.)

Coworker: “Anything else?”

Customer: “Yeah, can I also get one pound of shrimp steamed?”

Coworker: “Okay, right away.”

(As he’s filling a bag full of shrimp for the customer, the customer starts yelling and pointing wildly. I’m chopping chicken on the other side of the department and rush over.)

Customer: “Oh my god, that thing’s on fire!”

(I look over at the broken steamer; it’s making a hideous grinding sound and smoke is billowing from its air vents.)

Me: “What the h***?! Did you use the broken steamer?!”

Coworker: “What you mean, broken?”

(I run across the department and slam the power button on the broken steamer. The grinding noise stops and the smoke thins.)

Me: *pointing at giant sign* “Right there! Broken!”

Coworker: “Oh, that! I didn’t even see that!”

Customer: “You ruined my crabs!”

(My supervisor, who was in the butcher room, hears the shouting through the door and walks through.)

Supervisor: “What’s going on here?”

Coworker: “It says broken, but I didn’t see it! Now it’s making noise and there’s smoke coming out!”

Supervisor: “You turned it on even with that sign on the front of it that says it’s broken? What’s wrong with you?!”

Me: “Wait a minute… why was it even still plugged in if it’s broken? Who just put that sign on and left it plugged in?”

Supervisor: “Uh… I did.”

 

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