Twinstigating Trouble, Part 2

| Working | December 27, 2012

(My step-sister and I are around 7 and 8 when this occurs.)

Stylist: “Oh look, twins!”

My Sister: “We aren’t twins; we look nothing alike. I have dark hair and eyes, and my sister has blonde hair and blue eyes!”

Stylist: “No, you are definitely twins.” *to me* “Aren’t you, dear?”

Me: “No, she’s older than me!”

Stylist: “You don’t know what you’re talking about! You must be twins!”

(She drags us out to where our mom is waiting.)

Stylist: “They are twins, yes?”

My Mom: “Um, no.”

Stylist: “You must be wrong! I know they are twins!”

My Mom: “Well, I only gave birth to one of them, so, no.”

Stylist: “You are twins! You just don’t know it!”

 

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This Company’s CRM Needs A Wake-Up Call

| Working | December 27, 2012

(This happens while I am still a teenager living at home with my mother. One afternoon, I get a call on my cellphone.)

Representative: “Hello, this is [name] with [different electric co. than the one we use]. I’m sure you were shocked by your electrics bill this month!”

Me: “Actually, no. My mum is the one who’d have handled that bill seeing as I still live at home.”

Representative: “Oh, I’m sorry. Can you put your mother on the phone, please?”

Me: “Uh, no. You called me on my private cell number and I’m at work right now.”

Representative: “Right, so when would be a good time for us to call you back?”

Me: “Umm, I’d really rather you don’t call MY personal cell back at all. Call our home phone or my mother’s cell if you must, though I doubt she’s interested in your offer.”

Representative: “Okay, we’ll do that.” *click*

(Around the same time the next day, I get another call.)

Representative: “Hello, this is [other name] with [rival electric company]. I’m sure you were shocked by your electrics bill this month!”

Me: “Look, I just went over this with your colleague yesterday. I still live with my mum, so she deals with this kind of stuff, yet you keep calling me on my personal cellphone. Please just call our home phone and remove this number from your file, okay?”

Representative: “Um, okay.” *click*

(Sure enough, around the same time the next day…)

Representative: “Hello, this is [other name] with [rival electric company]. I’m sure you—”

Me: “Okay, let me stop you right there ’cause I’m getting kind of tired of this. This is the third time you’ve called me instead of my parents, even though I’m pretty sure I can’t even legally accept any offer you might have. How did you even get this number?”

Representative: “Um, well, there’s this new legislation that allows us to get the account holder’s number on file from your current electric company.”

Me: “Right. In that case the primary phone number would definitely have been our home phone which you don’t seem to have, and I very much doubt my cellphone is on there even as a secondary contact, given that I’m still a minor and all. Now how did you really get my number?”

Representative: “Um… right, I… I can see that you’re not interested. Thank you very much for your time.” *click*

(Thankfully I didn’t receive any more calls after that!)

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Who Said Life Is Unfare

| Working | December 27, 2012

(I’m headed into the centre of town to meet a friend. As I’m below the legal driving age, I have to catch a bus. I’m about to get on the bus when I realise that I only have notes, so I can’t pay my bus fare. Note that I live a few metres away from the stop.)

Me: *to the driver* “Um, sorry, but is it okay if you wait a moment while I get my fare? I just realised that I only have notes. Actually, I’ll just wait for the next bus.”

Driver: “Where are you going?”

Me: “Into town.”

Driver: “Get on.”

Me: “But I don’t have—”

Driver: “Just get on!”

(I do, thanking him profusely as I do. The journey passes quickly and we get into town. As I’m getting off the bus, I speak again to the driver.)

Me: “Thank you so much, sir! I’ll pay double fare on the way back.”

Driver: “No, don’t bother. You win some, you lose some. Losing one fare won’t hurt the company. Have a nice day!”

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Boneheaded

| Working | December 27, 2012

(I don’t go to this pet store often, because the service is pretty bad. In the month since I was last there, they have changed the layout.)

Me: “Excuse me, can you tell me where the rawhides are now?”

Employee: “The what?”

Me: “Rawhide bones. For dogs to chew.”

Employee: “I don’t know what they are.”

Me: “They’re rawhide that’s knotted at both ends, so it’s in the shape of a bone. They used to be on this wall right here, by the counter. I’m just wondering where in the store they are right now.”

Employee: “No. We don’t have any. We’ve never sold anything like that here.”

(I don’t want to argue, despite having bought rawhides there a month ago. I thank her and go to look at dog food, where I find an entire nine foot long display of many different kinds of rawhide bones. I gather an armful and bring them to the counter.)

Me: *holds one up* “Rawhide bones.”

Employee: “Oh.” *snorts*

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Pawning Your Work Off Is Fraud With Danger

| Working | December 26, 2012

(I work at a call center for a company that sells phone, internet, and TV services. I work in Billing and Ordering. On this particular day, I receive a call from Tech Support. Note: Tech is often pawning their job on us, as sending a technician out hurts their stats.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [company]; how can I help you today?”

Tech: “Hi, I’m on the other line with a customer. Basically, his service hasn’t been working for weeks. We’ve sent out technicians so many times that they’re refusing to go to his location anymore. I need you to send out a new install technician.”

Me: “I don’t have the power to do that. I can send out a technician if the customer needs a new jack or outlet, but I don’t have power to send out a new install tech.”

Tech: “Yes you do. You need to disconnect this customer’s service and set up a new account so he can get someone out there.”

Me: “Sending a technician out is your job, but let me see what I can do…”

(At this point, I put the tech on hold and talk to my manager, as the situation sounds suspicious.)

Me: “Okay, sir, I talked to my manager and he informed me that it’s illegal to disconnect and reconnect services like that. He also informed me that a technician can’t just refuse to go to a customer’s location.”

Tech: “Let me speak to your manager, because it’s not going to be that easy!”

Me: “Give me one moment…”

(My manager is already prepared to take the call.)

Manager: “Sir, I can not… no, WILL NOT allow someone in my department to commit sales fraud. We will not sell a customer a service they already have. That’s illegal and could get the company in a lot of trouble. Do your job and stop trying to get MY reps fired!”

(My manager then escalated the call to the tech manager, who fired the tech on the spot!)

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