Whether Sunday Or Monday, It’s Definitely Not A Fun Day

| New York, USA | Working | August 10, 2012

(Note: this happens to my friend one Monday evening.)

Friend: “I think I need replacement door hardware for the 400 series [brand].”

Employee: “Uh, what?”

Friend: “My door handle broke, and I need to get a replacement. It’s a [brand] door and the door is hanging over here, but I can’t find a replacement knob anywhere.”

Employee: “The knob broke?”

Friend: “Not the knob itself, but the internal parts. I probably need to replace the whole thing.”

Employee: “Door handles are… uh…”

Friend: “They are right over here, but I don’t see ones that are exactly like the one on this door right here.”

Employee: “Does it matter?”

Friend: “Well, the holes are already in the right place.”

Employee: “Oh yeah, makes sense.” *nodding and looking at floor*

Friend: “Is there someone else here in this department that could help?”

Employee: “No, I’m by myself on Sunday nights. You’ll have to call back Monday morning.”

Friend: “It is Monday, but I’m gathering I need to talk to the day guy.”

Employee: “No. It’s Sunday!”

Friend: “Well, I was at my office today and so were most of the other 200 people I work with, so I’m pretty sure it is Monday.”

Employee: “It’s really Monday?”

Friend: “Yes.”

Employee: “$#&%!” *hustles off*

A Knack For Detecting PEBCAK

| Chattanooga, TN, USA | Working | August 10, 2012

(I get a ticket that states that a user is not able to access their email. This particular employee works out on a factory floor, so they access their email via a webpage as opposed to email software like Outlook. I decide to call and see if we can figure it out quickly.)

Me: “Hi, this is [name] from the Help Desk. I have a ticket here that says you aren’t able to access your email.”

Employee: “That’s right. I’ve tried a hundred times, and it keeps saying that my ID or password is incorrect.”

Me: “Is the Caps Lock on?”

Employee: “Seriously? I’m not stupid. That’s typical of you IT-people. Always assuming us normal employees are stupid!”

Me: “I am not saying anything about your intellectual level. I am just going through the normal troubleshooting steps as I do with everyone. Let me remote into the machine so I can see what you are seeing.”

(Upon accessing the PC, the user is at a log-in screen with a username typed in and the password field blank.)

Me: “Okay, go ahead and try now.”

(I watch as the employee clicks “OK” without entering a password.)

Employee: “See? It didn’t work!”

Me: “You didn’t enter your password.”

Employee: “How was I supposed to know that I had to enter a password?”

Me: “The fact that there is a password box and you were getting an error message telling you that you password was wrong?”

Employee: “Smart***!” *hangs up*

Best Not To Press On With This Job

| Portland, ME, USA | Working | August 9, 2012

(I have just had my nails done and the cost is $35. I give the employee two twenties. She tries to give me a ten and a five as change.)

Me: “I thought you said it was $35?”

Employee: “Yes.”

Me: “I gave you forty.”

Employee: “Yes.”

Me: “You’re trying to give me $15 back in change.”

Employee: *confused* “Yes…”

Me: “Forty minus thirty-five is five. I gave you $40 for the nails and the tip. I don’t need any change.”

Employee: “A $15 tip? Thank you!”

Me: “Okay, let’s just stop. The cost for my nails is $35, right?”

Employee: “Right!”

Me: “And I gave you two twenties which is $40, right?”

Employee: “Right!”

Me: “Okay, so forty minus thirty-five is…?”

Employee: “Five, of course!”

Me: “Great! So my change would be $5, but I told you to keep it.”

Employee: “Yes, $15. Thank you again!”

(I am frustrated and am wondering if I should just forget about it and leave. The manager notices something is wrong and comes over to us.)

Manager: “Is there a problem?”

(I explain the whole thing to the manager.)

Manager: “No wonder our register is always short! What is wrong with you, [employee]? I have no idea if you’re playing dumb or not, but you are no longer allowed to TOUCH the register!”

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A Serial Ponderer

| Canada | Working | August 9, 2012

(This occurs during a shift in which a fellow coworker keeps pointing out whenever I think aloud, and makes an issue out of it by questioning my sanity.)

Coworker: *completely serious* “So, have you ever killed someone?”

Me: “No! Why would you even ask that?”

Coworker: “I thought I might catch you off guard!”

Have A Nice Flight

| Working | August 9, 2012


Via.