Who’s The Boss, Part 2

| Buffalo, NY, USA | Working | September 10, 2012

(I’ve just started working at this bagel shop, and am making a breakfast wrap that I’d only just learned out how to make about 20 minutes prior. I carry it to the counter and started ringing the customer up when my boss walks up behind me.)

Boss: “What the f*** is that?”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

(He points to the wrap I’ve just made.)

Boss: “I said what. The f***. Is THAT?!”

Me: “Um, it’s the breakfast wrap?”

Boss: “How the f*** do you think this is wrapped correctly? Are you an idiot? Are you slooooooow or something?”

(At this point, my boss starts doing an offensive and horrible impression of a mentally disabled person.)

Boss: “Hurr dee durr, I’m too stupid to wrap a f***ing breakfast sandwich!”

(Keep in mind, the customer hasn’t paid yet and has watched the entire conversation. He is a regular and knows I am new.)

Customer: “Excuse me, but where do you get off talking to this young lady like that? It looks fine and is probably delicious. I don’t mind; she’ll get the hang of it.”

Boss: “Shut up, a**hole! You can’t tell me how to talk to my employees! If she’s a stupid c***, I’ll tell her. I can say anything I want to her. I pay her check!”

(My boss walks away, but I’m nearly hyperventilating from trying not to cry. I meekly take the customer’s money and give him his change and breakfast. He hands me a $5 tip and pats my hand.)

Customer: “It’s okay, honey. You’re doing a good job. Don’t let her get to you. I’ll take care of it.”

(This statement confused me, but I found out later what he meant by it. Apparently, the customer knew the District Manager quite well, and immediately called him up to complain about my boss. The next day, my boss was gone!)


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Not The Sharpest Blade

| Virginia, USA | Working | September 10, 2012

(My store is often used to train new managers for other stores. We are currently training a manager who tends to micro-manage everything.)

Manager-in-training: “Alright, before we begin to cut down these boxes that we’re throwing away, let me instruct you on how to use a knife.”

Me: “It’s cool; I’ve been doing this for 3 years. I know how to use a knife.”

Manager-in-training: *ignores me* “Okay, when you use a knife, always make sure to point the knife AWAY from you!” *demonstrates*

Me: “You do know that I’m an Eagle Scout, right?”

It’s Poo-Back Time

| Minneapolis, MN, USA | Working | September 10, 2012

(Note: I am at work, doing dishes while my dad is waiting to hear back from the doctor with some very important test results.)

Me: *to coworker* “Do you mind if I go on break? I’m very worried about my dad and I would like to call and see how he’s doing. I’ve finished all the dishes.”

Coworker: “No.”

Me: “…Pardon?”

Coworker: “You’re not done with all the dishes.”

(She then smirks and throws a big pile of dishes on the floor.)

Coworker: “Well, what are you waiting for? Clean this up!”

(I clean all the dishes up and have a chat with my boss the next day. My coworker is fired. But, before she leaves, she defecates on my car and draws a picture of male genitalia with her own feces. She’s 45… much too old to be pooing on cars!)

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Stupid Co-Workers

| Working | September 10, 2012


You’ve Got To Be Key-dding Me

| Melbourne, Australia | Working | September 9, 2012

(I am a customer at a hardware store. They sell padlocks to which all the utility companies have skeleton keys, for locking up your switchboard. They’re very expensive and super-strong. I’m calling the store after being unable to unlock mine.)

Me: “I bought a power utility-compliant padlock for my meter box last week, and now it won’t open.”

Employee: “Are you using the key?”

Me: “I tried both keys that came with the lock.”

Employee: “Did they work?”

Me: “No, that’s why I’m calling.”

Employee: “Well, if you bring it back, we’ll replace it.”

Me: “That might be difficult.”

Employee: “Why?”

Me: “…”

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