The Streets With No Brain, Part 2

| Working | March 15, 2013

(Coming home from work I discover a gas company truck in front of my house. A worker with a clipboard is staring at the valve cover and looks confused.)

Me: “Can I help you?”

Worker: “I’m from [Gas Company A]. I’m terminating your service due to unpaid bills.”

Me: “We are customers of [Gas Company B].”

Worker: “Look lady, don’t give me a hard time. Pay your d*** bill next time and this won’t happen.”

(The worker returns to the truck to get tools. Fortunately, a local police car is driving past. I flag down the officer and explain the problem.)

Cop: “Look, I think we can clear this right up. If you look at the valve cover, you can see it says [Company B].”

Worker: “Not you, too. I don’t give a crap! The bill isn’t paid, they got a termination notice, they ignored it, and I’m turning off the gas.”

Cop: “How about you get your supervisor on the line for me?”

(The worker calls his supervisor, gives him a story of how a resident and a cop are giving him a hard time, and that the cop won’t let him do his job. Finally he announces the supervisor wants to talk to cop. The cop takes the phone and listens for very long time. He tries to interrupt several times, but the supervisor keeps talking. Finally, the cop manages to talk.)

Cop: “Yes, well, I’m standing here at [my address], and the valve clearly states [Company B].”

(There is a long pause, and then the cop repeats the address. He then hands the phone back to the worker. The worker listens for a few moments and then reads the address off the clipboard. While the house number is the same as mine, the street is different. Finally, the worker speaks to me.)

Worker: “Well, how was I supposed to know there were two number 219s in this neighborhood?!”


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Donut Underestimate The Sweetness Of Employees

| Working | March 15, 2013

(My friend and I are just 6 years old. We’ve found five cents on the ground and go into a takeaway/corner shop to see if they had any lollies (sweets) for that amount.)

My Friend: “Excuse me, do you have anything for five cents here?”

Server: “Hmm, let me see. I think so. Oh, yes, you can have these…”

(He proceeds to give us a bag of four hot donuts.)

Server: “…and you can keep the change.”

(He hands the five cents back to us. 20 years later and I still haven’t forgotten his generosity!)

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At Least They’ll Stop Being Short With Customers For A Change, Part 3

| Working | March 15, 2013

(A young teenage cashier has given me my total of $40.04. I hand her a $100 bill and tell her I have change in my pocket. However, while I dig out a nickel, she enters the $100 into the computer, so my change is therefore $59.96. I tried to hand her the nickel and the following conversation takes place…)

Cashier: “I can’t do that.”

Me: “Why not? I don’t want a bunch of ones and change back.”

Cashier: “It will make my drawer wrong.”

Me: “No, it won’t. I give you the nickel, and you give me back sixty and a penny.”

Cashier: “That’s not the same thing. I can’t have my drawer wrong.”

Next Customer: “It is the same thing.”

Cashier: “Nope, I can’t do it.”

(I see a manager passing by and flag them down while holding up my nickel.)

Me: “Hey, can she do this?”

(The manager examines the cashier’s screen before agreeing with me.)

Manager: “Yes, give him sixty and a penny.”

(The cashier already has two twenties, a ten, and a five in her hand. She starts counting out five ones.)

Me: “No, put that stuff back and give me three twenties.”

Cashier: “You have officially ruined my day.”

Next Customer: “I think I’ll use my debit card…”

Cashier: *to me* “I hope you do not have a pleasant day!”


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Unquestionable No-ledge

| Working | March 15, 2013

Me: “Hi, I’m starting practice and I believe I need to come in next Monday for—”

Receptionist: “NO!”

Me: “…I’m sorry?”

Receptionist: “NO! The person in charge of that is on leave! She’s only coming back on Monday!”

Me: “So, when do I come in? I have a letter telling me to come on Monday the—”

Receptionist: “NO!”

Me: “I have the letter right here.”

Receptionist: “NO! What’s your surname?”

Me: “It’s [name].”

Receptionist: “You come on Tuesday.”

Me: “Okay. Can you tell me how long the process will take? Is it five minutes, or—”

Receptionist: “NO! She has to explain to you the rules, and you need time for questions. NO! It will not take five minutes.”

Me: “So… maybe fifteen minutes?”

(Suddenly, the receptionist becomes strangely calm.)

Receptionist: “Yes, fifteen minutes should do it!”

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Third Time’s A Harm

| Working | March 14, 2013

(I am allergic to two medications. I’ve been to this hospital before and it’s stamped all over my chart. I also wear a medical ID bracelet stating my allergies. However…)

Doctor: “I can see that your asthma is flaring. Why don’t we use [medication I’m allergic to]?”

Me: “Um, I’m allergic to that. I’d really rather you didn’t.”

Doctor: “Oh, in that case, we won’t.”

(Several minutes later, the respiratory therapist comes in. As mix-ups have happened before, I inquire as to what medications he is giving me.)

Me: “Excuse me, sir, but could you tell me which medications are in there?”

Respiratory Therapist: “Certainly, young lady! It’s [hybrid combo that contains one of the meds I’m allergic to].”

Me: “I’m allergic to that.”

(The respiratory therapist looks at my chart, and then at my medical ID  bracelet.)

Respiratory Therapist: “And so you are.”

(Finally, I get the medications I’m not allergic to and I’m breathing better. They discover I also have a sinus infection, so I’m prescribed an antibiotic.)

Doctor: “And here is your prescription for [antibiotic I’m allergic to].”

My Friend & Me: “Allergic.”


Me: “I… don’t know. All I know is the last time I took it I broke out in hives, and I really don’t want a repeat of that, sir.”

Doctor: “Oh. In that case, I’ll write a script for [safe antibiotic].”

(I finally got out of there, and thankfully wasn’t given any of the medications I’m rather allergic to!)

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