Just Because You’re Lazy

| Working | October 19, 2012


Occupation Impossible, Part 2

| Duluth, MN, USA | Working | October 18, 2012

Manager: “Young lady, you still have returns to do!”

Me: “I’m sorry, I was just back at customer service. I’ll pick it up.”

Manager: “Not there! I meant on your fitting room rack.”

Me: “I know I have to put those away. I put them there.”

Manager: “Why would you put them there?”

Me: “So that they were ready to be put away after I was done with registers?”

Manager: “But you’re supposed to put them away right away!”

Me: “So should I have not helped the customer?”

Manager: “No, you should have helped the customer!”

Me: “But… you want me to put away my returns at the same time?”

Manager: “Yes! Put away your returns while working on the register!”

Me: “Think about that for a minute.”

Manager: *pauses to think* “Oh, shut up!”

Occupation Impossible

When Feeling Sauer, Just Invoke A Higher Power

| USA | Working | October 18, 2012

(Note: I work very limited hours at a German deli, and so often have to consult a manager on food specifics. One of our managers can also be a bit spacey, so I always confirm with him any answer he gives me, because he sometimes changes his mind halfway through answering.)

Customer: “Hi, I would like to buy some of the fresh sauerkraut. Do you know approximately how long it will last refrigerated?”

Me: “Well, sauerkraut by itself will last quite a while, but the kind we make here has bacon mixed in, which will affect how long it lasts. Let me ask my manager to give you a better estimate.”

Customer: “Sure, thanks.”

Me: *to my manager* “Hey, do you know how long this sauerkraut will last if refrigerated? I’m not sure how the bacon affects the longevity compared with the jarred brand.”

Manager: “It should last [amount of time].”

Me: “And that’s accounting for the fresh bacon in there, correct?”

Manager: *glares at me and turns to the customer* “It will last [amount of time].”

Customer: “Okay, thank you.” *goes to register*

Manager: *to me* “Don’t ever contradict me!”

Me: “I’m very sorry. I was just trying to get a sense of how having bacon in the sauerkraut affects how long it will last.”


May-Your-Nays Be Never In Your Flavor

| Langhorne, PA, USA | Working | October 18, 2012

(I’ve called in an order of a BLT with no mayonnaise to eat on my lunch break. The BLT is clearly listed on the menu as “Bacon, lettuce, tomato, and mayonnaise,” but as I can’t eat mayonnaise, I specifically request it to be left off. I go to pick up my sandwich, and when I get back to work, I see that the sandwich is covered in mayo. I call the restaurant to see what can be done.)

Me: “Hi, I just picked up what was supposed to be a BLT with no mayo, but the sandwich is covered in mayo. I can’t eat this. Can I get a replacement?”

Employee: “BLTs come standard with mayonnaise, you know.”

Me: “Yes, I know. I can’t eat mayonnaise. I asked for no mayonnaise on the sandwich.”

Employee: “So, what’s the problem?”

Me: “The sandwich has mayonnaise on it. I’m lactose intolerant.”

Employee: “But BLTs are supposed to have mayonnaise on them. If you didn’t want mayonnaise, you should have asked for no mayonnaise.”

Me: “…Can I speak to your manager?”

(The manager comes on the phone, and we confirm that I want a BLT: bacon, lettuce, and tomato. Cheese is not mentioned anywhere in my conversation with either employee. After skipping lunch and driving to the restaurant after work to pick up the replacement sandwich, I have this exchange with the same two employees.)

Employee: “Here. BLT, no mayo. You wanted American cheese on that, right?”

Me: “…Is that a joke?”

Manager: *to employee* “Are you freaking kidding me? She tells you she’s lactose intolerant, so you go ahead and put cheese, a dairy product, on a BLT?”

Employee: “Well, it needed something besides just bacon, lettuce, and tomato!”

Me: “No, it didn’t! It’s a BLT! Bacon, lettuce, and tomato! Why would a BLT ever get cheese on it to begin with?”

Employee: “So you don’t want the sandwich? What CAN we do for you?”

Me: “You can get me a refund.”

(The manager gave me my money back, plus a few extra dollars, but I haven’t ordered from there since. Nor have any of my coworkers!)

1 Thumbs

I May Look Calm

| Working | October 18, 2012

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