(I go to get a hotdog from a stand. The man puts it in the bun and automatically reaches for the sauces.)
Me: “Oh, no, could I just have it plain, please?”
Employee: “What?”
Me: “No ketchup or mustard.”
Employee: “But I don’t know how to make it without them.”
Me: “Just don’t put them on.”
Employee: *spends a while mentally processing this then hands me the hotdog, still looking confused*
(My husband and I are expecting our first baby. My husband’s supervisor wants to send him out of state for a week of training right after the baby is due. His supervisor calls me.)
Supervisor: “Well, I know that you’re due to have your baby soon, but I really want [Husband] to go to this week-long training session.”
Me: “Hey, you know that white couch your wife has in the living room?”
Supervisor: “Yes.”
Me: “If you send [Husband] out for that training session, when I go into labor I’m coming over to your house and having this baby on that couch.”
(My husband’s supervisor decided that he could put off the training for a while.)
Did you find this story on our Overtime roundup?
(My mother was big into mail ordering. When she died suddenly, my sisters and I were trying to clear up her affairs. A package was delivered about two weeks later, and I call the mail order house.)
Me: “We just received a package from you that my mother ordered shortly before her death. I’d like to return it for a refund, please.”
Customer Service Rep: “Oh, I’m sorry to hear about your loss. Can I issue a credit?”
Me: “No, I’d like a refund check made out to my mother’s estate.”
Customer Service Rep: “Well, we’d prefer to issue a credit.”
Me: “Did you hear me tell you that this person is dead? She’s probably not going to order too much more from you.”
Customer Service Rep: “I don’t know. I’ll have to talk to my supervisor.”
Me: “Well, unless he can bring her back, I’ll have to insist on a refund.”
(I eventually did receive a refund check.)
(I am staying in England to help a friend, and decide to go grocery shopping, I have been to this particular store a few times, and have encountered little to no issues in the past. There is only one checkout line open, and the customer is deep in idle conversation with the cashier. Since my items are on the treadmill and I’m in no rush for the day, I wait until they are done. A couple of minutes later, the cashier begins scanning my items.)
Me: “Ma’am, I’ll need a bag for this.” *since the store charges for bags and it’s far too much to carry without*
Cashier: *is looking everywhere but my direction, quickly scanning*
Me: “Ma’am? I’ll need a bag.”
Cashier: *scowls and immediately tosses me a bag from under the counter*
(At this point I’m just wanting to pay for my items and go. She calls out the amount and I swipe my card. Since all stores I’ve been to, including this one, require a receipt to be signed for swiped cards and have pens on hand, I quickly bag my groceries and wait for the receipt.)
Cashier: “Sign this, please.” *tosses the receipt towards groceries, then immediately turns away*
Me: “I’m going to need a pen for this…”
Cashier: *turns and glares at me directly in the eye* “Well, that’s your problem now, isn’t it?”
Me: “No, lady, it’s your job to make sure the store doesn’t get in trouble with the bank.”
(She did finally toss over a pen, but made sure to act like it was an extreme effort to do so. I didn’t see her on future visits to the store, but I started carrying a pen and a bag just to avoid that problem again in the future.)
(I’m a manager, and I’ve just transferred from a stand-alone store (with a drive-thru and a dining room) to one located within a shopping centre food court. It’s the middle of our busiest half hour of the day, as the local school kids come for lunch when the phone rings.)
Me: “[Location], [Store]. This is [My Name] speaking.”
Caller: “Hello there. How are you this afternoon?”
Me: “Well, thank you. How are you?”
Caller: “Thank you so much for asking. I’m well, too!”
Me: “I’m glad to hear…” *at this point wondering if this is a prank call*
Caller: “By the way, my name is [Caller] and I’m calling from [Solar Panel Company].”
(At this point I recognise the script, having taken these calls almost daily at my old location, On average it would take about five minutes to convince the caller that I can’t agree to install solar panels on our roof, and that anything like that is decided by our corporate offices.)
Me: “Listen, I’m going to stop you right there.”
Caller: *continues with script about government rebates*
Me: “Listen! You’ve called a store located within a food court. You need to do some research before calling random businesses. I do not own the roof or the building. Please do not call this number again.” *hangs up*
