(We are a very sociable company and many of us turn up early to eat breakfast before starting work. A few people have turned up extra early as we are behind on some of our orders. Colleague #1 from the other team has come to our side of the office before we officially start. Colleague #2 is still finishing her breakfast, which today is a chocolate filled pastry that has mostly melted in the heat and so she is covered in chocolate.)

Colleague #1: “Hey, [Colleague #2], I know it is still five minutes before you start, but is there any chance you could do [very quick one-minute task], please?”

Colleague #2: “Sorry, you will need to wait until I have finished breakfast.”

Colleague #1: “Um, really? You know we are behind and I need to get this sent as soon as possible. Could you please do it now and finish your breakfast after?”

Colleague #2: *shows her chocolate covered hands* “You can either have it in a few minutes, or you can have it covered in chocolate. Which would you prefer?”

Colleague #1: “I guess I can wait a few minutes.”

(I’m a supervisor in an office supply store. Recently, my boss hired a new employee who, he claimed, aced his interview and is perfect for the open cashier position. However, we quickly learn that the new employee is lazy, uncooperative, and severely lacking in tact and professionalism when dealing with customers. He even goes so far as to ignore duties and customers in order to go and play videogames on some of our display tablets and laptops. Despite being able to prove that the employee has been shirking duties and playing games via the in-store surveillance, the store manager refuses to fire the employee. One day, while going over the store’s daily task checklist.)

Me: “All right, [Employee], it’s your turn to do the clean-up around the registers. Since it’s slow right now, why don’t you go ahead and sweep up while you’re waiting for customers to come and check out?”

Employee: *sighing dramatically* “Fine.”

(He proceeds to start sweeping, but does it like he’s never held a broom before in his life. He bypasses obvious dust and leaves tracked in by customers and sweeps perhaps three square feet of floor over and over. A customer approaches, and stands there watching him for several seconds.)

Customer: “Honey, didn’t your mama ever teach you how to use a broom?! You’re not doing anyone any good sweeping like that!”

(She proceeded to lecture him on how to properly sweep floors and wouldn’t check out until she could watch him use the broom to her standards. I knew it was a lost cause, but I was glad I wasn’t the only one who could see a problem with the employee’s behavior!)

(My boss hired a new cashier who is absolutely horrible at his job. He ignores the requests of the female supervisors, shirks his duties, and spends most of his time in the electronics section playing games on the display tablets and laptops. As one of the store’s female supervisors, my attempts at getting this guy to actually do the job he is being paid for are more like pulling teeth. One day, I find the guy trying to assemble an office chair directly behind one of the only two registers we have in our little store.)

Me: “Hey, [Employee]? We need to use that register to ring people up, but we can’t get to it with all this stuff. [Other Employee] almost tripped over this box you left here, and I don’t want anyone getting hurt. Can you move to the end of the counter where there’s room for all this?”

Employee: “No, I’m building it here.”

Me: “There is a line forming. We need this second register, and we can’t use it with you here. You need to move. Right now.”

Employee: “No! I’m fine where I am!”

(Fed up, I poke my head into the store manager’s office where he’s taking a conference call.)

Me: “I hate to bother you, but [Employee] is ignoring me and he’s got a line backed up at the registers, and customers are starting to get angry!”

Manager: “What?!”

(He marches out, sees the giant mess of chair parts, packaging, and tools behind our register, the blocked walkway with this employee sitting on the floor right in the middle of it all, and the line of people. He wades through the mess and takes the partially built chair right from the employee’s hands.)

Manager: “[Employee], we don’t build chairs behind the register. Move your stuff over here or clock out and go home. I don’t have time to deal with this!”

(The employee griped and complained the entire time he had to do his work 10 feet away at the end of the counter, and I hopped onto the register and cleared up the line in no time. I’m still shocked at the lengths to which that guy — a grown, 30-something year old man — would go to try and assert his superiority over us female managers!)

(The company owner is a man well-known for only hiring young women to work for him, and he openly brags that he wants all of his employees to be scared of him. We have hired a new intern who is very good at her job, but she’s quite a confident girl and isn’t visibly cowed by him, so he goes out of his way to make her life difficult. This whole communication is via email.)

Boss: *to Intern* “I have decided that since you are not integrating into the company very well, you need to make everyone in the office tea once a day. I would like you to do this at precisely 3:45 everyday, without fail.”

(We are all a bit taken aback by this request, as there are 21 people in the office, and generally we all make our own tea when we feel like it. We all help her out by giving her a heads up when 3:45 comes round, and she is expected to drop whatever she is doing, no matter how important, and make 21 cups of tea, even if we don’t want one. One day, the boss is in an afternoon meeting.)

Boss: *at 3:50* “Would you care to explain why I did not receive my cup of tea at 3:45 as instructed?”

Intern: “I am very sorry, but I was told you were in a meeting which was not to be disturbed under any conditions. Next time, I will bring your tea in.”

(The next day, the boss is in another meeting. The intern knocks, and asks if any of the clients would like a drink and also brings the boss his tea as instructed.)

Boss: “I am extremely unimpressed by your behaviour this afternoon. I don’t expect to have important meetings interrupted by a junior member of staff for non-emergency matters.”

(Both she and I were fired within the month, and couldn’t be more glad!)

(I’m looking round a food market with some friends. I pause to look at a wok filled with a chicken and rice dish, which looks interesting but smells a bit hot.)

Vendor: “Would you like to try a spoon-full?”

Me: “It’s not spicy, is it?”

Vendor: “Oh, no.”

Me: “Not at all?”

Vendor: “Nope.”

Me: “I actually mean that. I have very low tolerance of spice.”

Vendor: “Nothing to worry about.”

Me: “Sorry, I don’t mean to be rude; it’s just I get people who’ll tell me ‘This isn’t spicy at all. Just a couple of chilies to bring the flavor out.’”

Friend: “You are being rude.”

Me: “Sorry. I didn’t mean to accuse you of that. I’m a fussy eater, you see.”

Vendor: “Actually—”

(Too late. I take a bite and feel a slight but noticeable burning, which it takes some effort not to respond to.)

Vendor: “Yeah, that thing you said about the chilies…? It’s actually true.”