Time To Try Another Tactic

| Wisconsin, USA | Working | December 7, 2012

(Note: I work for a family-run business. My father is the owner, and I am his only child, a girl. My father and I are the only ones in the office when a call comes in.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [business], this is Sarah. How can I help you?”

Caller: “Yes, I would like to speak to [my father] right away.”

Me: “May I tell him who’s calling? ”

Caller: *snottily* “No, you may not! Just put me through.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but [father] is on the phone at the moment. May I tell him who’s calling?”

Caller: “I don’t care! Tell him that his daughter is on the line and it’s very important!”

Me: “I’m sorry, who did you say? ”

Caller: “UGH! I said I’m his daughter. Can’t you hear? Now, put me through!”

(I pull the phone half an inch away from my face as if I’m talking to someone off the phone.)

Me: “Hey, Dad! It’s me from the future on line one. Do you want the spoilers or not?”

Caller: *click*

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It’s Only Maybe 90%

| Working | December 6, 2012

Not So Powerless To Help

| UK | Working | December 6, 2012

(Our flat has a pre-pay electric meter that you top up by taking a small plastic key to any participating shops. It’s fairly common in rented accommodation in the UK. Our local corner store offers this service, but many of the staff are not trained on how to do it. I went on my lunch break to get a top up, which is peak time for this shop. I have been waiting in line for about 10 minutes at this point.)

Me: “Hi, can I have £40 on my electric, please?”

Cashier: *looks at the key* “We don’t do this here.”

Me: “…Um, yes, you do.”

Cashier: “No, we don’t.”

Me: “I’ve topped it up here plenty of times in the past, though. I know you do it here.”

Cashier: “Well, I don’t know how to do it, so you’ll have to go somewhere else.”

Me: “Are you serious?”

Cashier: “Go next door to [shop’s name]. They’ll probably do it.”

Me: “But they don’t, I’ve asked in there before. You do it here.”

Cashier: “Look, I don’t know how to do this, so just go next door.”

(There is such a big queue behind me that I don’t want to cause much of a fuss, so I go to the stationer’s next door on the off chance that they’ve started topping up electric keys.)

Me: “Hi, you don’t do electric top ups here, do you?”

Next Door Cashier: “Nope, sorry! They do in the corner shop next door, though.”

Me: “Okay, it’s just that I tried next door and the girl told me to come here, even though I know they do it there!”

Next Door Cashier: *sighs* “Oh, for goodness sake! AGAIN?! Come with me!”

(I follow the other cashier back into the corner store, who goes straight to the store’s manager.)

Next Door Cashier: *to the corner store’s manager* “Another one of your customers trying to get some electricity top up that was turned away! You NEED to train your staff better, seriously!”

(The manager was so embarrassed that she topped up my electric key right then and there. Ever since I have not encountered a problem topping up at that store!)

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Taking The Ma Out Of Maternity

| UK | Working | December 6, 2012

(I’m tagging clothes with a new colleague, showing her what to do and where things go. We’ve been working for about an hour when she asks for help.)

Coworker: “Hey [my name], is this a man’s or a woman’s?”

Me: “What does it say on the tag?”

Coworker: “Um, it just says maternity. There’s no size on it or anything. How are we supposed to know what it is if people cut the tags off?”

Me: “But you just said it’s maternity.”

Coworker: “Yeah so? Which is it… men’s or women’s?”

Me: “What do you think ‘maternity’ means?”

Coworker: “Isn’t it like a brand of clothing?”

Me: “Not quite. Maternity means for pregnant women.”

Coworker: “Oh my God! Are you kidding me?” *turns red*

This Coworker Is A Real Headache

| USA | Working | December 6, 2012

(Despite having a migraine, one of my coworkers has decided to stay and continue working on our night shift because she doesn’t want to get an infraction. A snotty coworker, however, seems to have a problem with this.)

Snotty Coworker: *scoffs* “Oh, please! She’s faking. I have REAL migraines. I know what they’re like.”

Coworker with migraine: “Oh, do you now?”

Snotty Coworker: “DUH! I mean, come on… it just hurts really bad. It’s not like people can’t deal with them.”

Coworker with migraine: “Actually, it hurts so badly that you want to cry, but crying makes it worse. Crying makes it worse… light makes it worse… sound makes it worse. Then, it starts throbbing and it makes you want to puke. But that makes it worse, too. It makes you want to curl up in a ball and make the world stop because existing hurts.”

Snotty Coworker: “God, just take a Tylenol.”

Me: “Um, most doctors actually say that once you already HAVE a migraine, not much can actually make it stop. There are drugs you can take during the onset, but after it’s already there, there’s very few things that’ll actually have an effect.”

Snotty Coworker: “That’s not true. I would know!”

Me: “Oh yeah? How?”

Snotty Coworker: “Because I’m better than you.”

Me: “I’m in nursing school, and we’ve been learning about people with conditions like hers lately.”

Snotty Coworker: “No! You’re wrong because I’m better than you!”

(My coworker with the migraine ended up having to call someone to come pick her up because she couldn’t drive home in her condition. The snotty coworker ended up getting fired for having a similar argument with the boss, about how she couldn’t be wrong because ‘she’s better than everyone. She will NOT be missed.)

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