Show ‘Em Who’s Boss

| Des Plaines, IL, USA | Working | April 24, 2013

(I’m in college and have just started working for my dad’s company for a summer job. I’ve been working there about a week when another coworker, a college student, starts work there.)

Coworker: “You have to do the [menial stuff], and I’ll supervise you. I’m in tight with [assistant HR Manager], so you have to do what I say.”

(I ignore him, and continue doing my job. He starts getting mad because I’m not doing his.)

Coworker: “Didn’t you hear me? You have to do my work while I supervise, or else I’ll call [assistant HR Manager] and say that you are lazy. He’ll believe me because we are tight.”

(This goes on for a few more minutes when [assistant HR Manager] comes down to the press area.)

Coworker: “Now you’re in trouble!  I’ll tell him how much you’ve been slacking off, and he’ll fire you!”

(My coworker starts walking to [assistant HR Manager], puts his hand out, and calls him by name. However, the assistant HR manager ignores him and shakes my hand instead.)

Assistant HR Manager: *to me* “How’s work? Are there any problems or anything I can do for you?”

Coworker: *dumbfounded* “What is going on? How do YOU know him?”

Me: “Didn’t you know? My dad is his boss.”

(As soon as he heard this, my coworker shut up, left early, and never came back!)

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Eye Of Noob And Toe Of Error Logs

| Chattanooga, TN, USA | Working | April 23, 2013

(I am about to walk out of my office door to take a break. As I open the door one of the manufacturing managers is just standing there staring at me.)

Manager: “Hey, you got a minute?”

Me: “I was about to take a break, but sure.”

Manager: “Well, my computer is broken so you have to come and fix it.”

Me: “What’s going on?”

Manager: “The computer won’t wake up!”

Me: “What all have you tried?”

Manager: “I have been slamming on the keyboard keys for 20 minutes and nothing.”

(I notice that the screen is black and decide to investigate. His desktop unit is located under his desk.)

Me: “There, all fixed.”

Manager: “What was it?!”

Me: “It wasn’t turned on.”

Manager: “Witchcraft!”

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Please Go(od) Away

| USA | Working | April 23, 2013

(I am looking for a Traffic Officer at a subway station to ask a question about their service. I finally hunt one down and I approach her. It’s been a long day and while I am annoyed and tired, I have a smile on my face.)

Me: “Good evening, how are you?”

Officer: “Good, you?”

Me: “Good—”

(Before I can ask my question, she interrupts.)

Officer: “Good.”

Me: “Good—”

Officer: “Good.”

Me: “Good—”

Officer: “Good! Thanks for the chat. Have a great evening!”

(She then turns around and walks away.)

Me: “…Good?”

This Rep’s Number Is Up

| Australia | Working | April 23, 2013

(I’ve recently gotten my first mobile. However, a bank company has been calling me on and off for five days.)

Representative: “Is Mr. [name] speaking?”

Me: “Does my voice really sound like a ‘mister’ to you?”

Representative: “I don’t have TIME for this! Where’s your dad hiding?!”

Me: “I don’t know who gave you my number, but this is my personal mobile. My father does not use your bank.”

Representative: “Oh, okay, we’ll call back when he’s available.” *click*

(A day later, the same representative calls.)

Representative: “Hello, is Mr. [name] there?”

Me: “No. I don’t know him, I am not at all related to him, and I’m sorry to say that this is the sixth time you’ve called this number and it will not change the fact  that it’s mine.”

Representative: “Listen up, kid. This is Mr. [name]’s number, and I don’t CARE if he’s in trouble; we NEED to reach him. I suggest you take your f***ing bad-a** attitude SOMEWHERE ELSE, because we KNOW he uses this number. He gave it to us!”

Me: “I’m very sorry, sir, but I’m most certainly not the man you’re looking for. I’m a 15-year-old studying at [college], not Mr. [name]. I don’t have a bank account with anyone yet.”

Representative: “Cut the crap and get him on the phone NOW!”

Me: “Sorry, what was your name again? Didn’t catch it. And could you transfer me to your supervisor? ”

(He gives me his name and transfers me. Thankfully, the supervisor not only gets the representative on the phone to apologise, but also later calls me back to let me know the representative was calling a random number—mine—to cover up for his own father!)

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Making More Than You

| Working | April 23, 2013

slack worker

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